Agnes by Tony Cochran for December 31, 2017

I learned to eat buttered soda crackers when I was a kid. Never knew anyone else who did. Must be a local/regional thing.

I ate butter on soda crackers as a kid, too….

and on big, thick plain crackers called pilot biscuits, and big square ones called Uneeda biscuits, both of which I wish were still available.

Sometimes my mother let us butter little bitty oyster crackers, too, cos we thought it was fun.

The problem with Agnes’ buttered crackers, though, is that Lord knows what she used for butter…

or crackers.

Either your invitees couldn’t read the teal invitations or the conditions of parole prevented them from accepting. Did you write R.S.V.P?

I’ll come to your party, Agnes! Not drinking any of that stuff you found in Trout’s fridge, though.

Roomy place.

Mmmmm. Buttered crackers . . .