Breaking Cat News by Georgia Dunn for April 19, 2024

Detective Goldie. Working the case. Just the facts meow.

Goldie loaf!

Did Puck eat later than the others? He seems much more together than they are.

Elvis is out-drama-queening Ora Zella. I did not think it possible.

Elvis is going to need some spïces or condiments to get the curtains down! I’d suggest he stay away from the sriracha though.

♬ Be careful blocking the door, ooh-ooh,

Don’t lie on the floor, ooh-ooh,

Don’t eat drapes for sure, ooh-ooh,

You’ll get a pain and ruin your tum-tum! ♬

My brother and sister in law had multiple cats, one time when they were on vacation and we went over to feed their cats we found that they’d gotten into the cabinet where their dry food was and had ripped open a bag of food and scattered it all over the kitchen. They didn’t need any stinking humans!

If Elvis eats the curtains, it’ll be curtains for him…

So far, a 2-2 split. Goldie and Puck are calm, Elvis and Ora Zella are dramatic. Where are Lupin and Iggy? Can they break the tie?

I wonder whether The Woman couldn’t have borrowed some food from upstairs or downstairs to tide the clowder over for breakfast.

Years ago, one of mine sneaked into the pantry when I wasn’t looking and opened a hole in a 20 lb. bag of kibble that was stored there. I didn’t find the hole until I opened the bag in normal fashion sometime later and found it full of ants. And I mean full, never seen so many in one place. Needless to say that bag of kibble got double garbage-bagged and hauled straight to the dump!

If the Woman were to go on trial, she better hope to have Puck as her witness. His testimony would at least be factually accurate. Elvis, on the other hand, would win the hearts of the jury with his emotional accounting of the Horrible Event.

“…and I’m starting with the green ones, I’ve never like that color anyway”.

Usually, it’s Ora Zella eating curtains.

Oh Elvis, if we thought you could be trusted in the great outdoors, the would have taken you shopping in the baby sling,

This is a CATastrophe!

This in response to yesterday’s chat, I’m a bit behind. When the little darling I look after often comes to stay I have to shuffle-walk and look slightly behind my feet as I do. When we go downstairs (she is my shadow, er, who goes ahead of me), she weaves down the stairs and often takes a break and swishes her tail about to increase the chances of me stepping on it. Does she not realise it will postpone her feeding time ?

If she doesn’t come back in two days, he’s eating you, Goldie! (it’s really not funny, but I can’t help but laugh!) ;D

If missing too long then it can only means one theeng Elvis. Them steenky sneaky outer space aliens could’ve gots them.

yup, same event, two eye witneses, two different stories, good luck Goldie.

I frequently remind my cats that until they develop opposable thumbs, I am necessary.

I am surprised that after several days (or 20 minutes, depending on your source) that Elvis still has the strength to protest.

Cat motto:

What have you done for me lately?

Elvis is reminding me of a time when my kitty was prescribed a medication whose side effect made her act in ways not typical for my snuggly little love bug. The side effect? Paranoia! She broke through TWO doors in the middle of the night to stare evilly at me while I feigned sleep! A frantic call to the vet the next morning gave me my explanation. Thankfully she did not need to remain on those meds. I am not proud of my behavior on that phone call…. lack of sleep and fear of life is no excuse, but I may have told off an innocent receptionist.

Love Goldie in her new investigative reporting role!!

Ha ha! Oh, I can imagine what Elvis’s yowl would sound like!

Abba: Mamma Mia

I was let down by you, and I think you know when

Looking for the kibble bag, it had come to an end!

Look at me now, lying on the floor

I don’t know how you are gonna get through that door!

Will we eat breakfast anymore?

…….

One full bowl would fix everything

One full bowl would make my heart sing! Oooo!

…….

C’mon, Woman there you go again

My, my! To the grocery store!

C’mon, Woman it is almost noon

Half past eight’s around the corner!

Yes, the cat’s say they are starving

Please heed our dire warning!

Why, why, did the kibble have to go?

OMC panel two is hilarious. And so is panel three. Panel four with its dignified toddlering is funny enough, but both two and three were laugh aloud for me!

Elvis, has eaten the curtains, doesn’t have the same ring to it, as- Elvis, has left the building!

You’ll have to climb the curtains first, Elvis, and we all know how that went.

I’m with you, Elvis! Should we shred the curtains in protest, as well as preparation?

Meanwhile, Back on the Nile

At the Nile Harbor

Captain Horatio: Thank you for your gracious hospitality, Your Majesty. We are ready to set sail for the Britannia Isles.

Queen Catshepsut the Golden: May you have fair winds and following seas.

Ziggy Starcross: Ready to get back to the sea, cousin?

Iggy Shipwright: Ready, willing, and able!

Captain Horatio: All aboard! Prepare to set sail!

All: Safe travels!

Two Weeks Later

Captain Horatio: Greetings, Harbor Master! Permission to dock!

Harbor Master Alwin: Permission granted! And welcome to the Britannia Isles.

On Land

Alwin: It’s been too long since we’ve greeted the Red Planet Spider and her crew. How is everything?

Captain Horatio: We are quite well. We bring cheeses from Egypt, as well as gold and gems created by the greatest crafts elf of all, Fe-Anaro.

Alwin: Do I see scrolls written by the classic authors such as Miss Decorum? And Erma Bombosis?

Captain Horatio: Yes. And recipes from Peg Bracat.

Enter Ship Rat

Alice-Ata: Dagobert! Is that you?

Dagobert Rat: Alice-Ata! It’s great to see you!

Alice: Remember the cheese taking team at Punn State?

Dagobert: How could I forget? It was there I learnt just how much I could lift.

Alice: The second rule of cheese taking! Just after what?

All: Never tell!

Sorry Goldie, but The First 48 has already been done. Now if one of you should actually DIE from starvation, then you might, just might have a shot at being on that tv show. Until then sit back, relax, roll a fat one with some catnip and chill.

Elvis, dear drama queen, the woman will be back shortly (a lifetime for you, I know), with life-saving food and treats to keep your little tum-tum full and happy.

Best detective drama yet!

Is it just me or will elvis eat the curtains if she comes back or not

For some reason, I’m hearing Elvis voiced by Doctor Zachary Smith (Jonathan Harris), of Lost In Space.

20 minutes is pretty much 48 hours in cat time. Hang in there, Elvis!

Something to pass on that you may already know… If you buy litter in the large plastic container, the tool painters use to open a 5 gallon bucket will open the lid on the square litter bucket. About $5 at Amazon. Work smarter not harder ;-)

OT: I just wanted to say thank you all for the warm wishes.

This is hysterical!

No, Elvis—curtains are just empty calories. Eat the sofa instead.

Elvis is already planning where to throw up after eating the curtains.

Funny of the day….while scrolling thru the news, I found this weeks HuffPost Funniest Cats and Dogs included a photograph of a business sign which read:

Kinik HaiwanSchrödingerVeterinary Clinic

Caption was “we have some good news and bad news about your cat……”