Broom Hilda by Russell Myers for July 16, 2011

Gee, my GPS does that, and it wasn’t even 1/2 price.

That GPS sounds like Don Rickels did the voice.

That GPS was customized for Broomie: hence, the low, low price (no one else would dream of buying it)!

I have the “Mother-in Law in the back seat” model.

On the contrary, I’d price this GPS very high. It knows who is driving.

I found a custom voice for a GPS I had that was the voice of a Dalek (from the Doctor Who series). It would scatter a few dire threats and disparaging remarks among the directions.

I’m no idiot. I have no GPS.

I love it! Where can I get one?

I are a man. I don’t need no steenkin GPS.

So why is she driving a ’56 Plymouth, instead of a broom?

Funny, I have both, and use both.

You’re right, of course. Things get a little fuzzy after 50-some years…

“GPS” = “Granny’s Portable Satellite.” Guaranteed to aggravate you!

I was the proud owner of a 59 Plymouth Savoy and my fins were horizontal.

My GPS is a collection of maps.