Ted Rall for April 29, 2013

Transcript:

The Boston Marathon bombings have forced us to increase border security. (Doctor: Push... you can do it...) (Police Officer: Back away! Immigration!) Vidal Malik Hasan, the Fort Hood Shooter, was a U.S. Born self radicalized Muslim. Because terrorists can be born here, we've decided to declare the uterus foreign territory. (Doctor: We've got dilation!) Before they're admitted to the U.S. newborn applicants must pass a background check, pay back taxes and pass a citizenship test. (Police Officer: What about this kicking during the 2nd trimester?) Will your alien fetus get into America? Moms, it's up to you! (Woman 1: I'm feeding my baby past and repeated listens to Bush's "mission accomplished" speech!) (Woman 2: They're sending my baby back!) (Police Officer: Go back to fetus-stab!)