Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for October 05, 2020

Me be gobsmacked …!

If the frog says so, it must be true.

noun.1.Literally, a fly swallower; hence, one who keeps his mouth open; a boor; a silly and credulous person.

Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!

I shall add this one to my list of “compact words.” [Things like gumusservi and kummerspeck)

On another note, this really deserves some context because “English Tourist” is not a generally-known term for “gullible person:”

“English tourists run over for a fortnight to Ireland, talk to the jarvies, listen to the peasants themselves, forbear to go near any educated or responsible person with knowledge of the facts and a character to lose, and accept as gospel everything they hear. There is no check and no verification. Pat and Tim and Mike give their accounts of this and that, bedad! and tell their piteous tales of want and oppression. The English tourist swallows it all whole as it comes to him, and writes his account to the sympathetic Press, which publishes as gospel stories which have not one word of truth in them. In fact, the term “English tourist” has come to mean the same as gobemouche in France; and clever Pat knows well enoughthat there is not a fly in the whole region of fable which is too large for the brutal Saxon to swallow."

From About Ireland by E. Lynn Linton, 1890

…gosh, holly all mighty…

…English tourist has already been replaced by Fox / Fake news watcher…

…and is there anywhere ever such a thing as a femailman?…

…my experience is if you swallow the fly they’ll hope you die…

…does the fly have buttons or zippers?…

…my holy underwear says different…

…if god is just a video game designer…

..couldn’t the earth once been flat and the globe we live on now a simple updated version of the game?…

…and dinosaur bones just old code that didn’t get erased away?…

..and Frog Applause the instruction manual we were never supposed to find?…

…think about it…

…this post is long because it is never supposed to be read…

…the glace over imprints the mainframe design …

…brought to you by Cheverlot Corvettes…

…Batmobiles for real people & PBR – it kills the virus if you drink too much of it…

Charlie and the gobstopper ooompa loompas

They are no match for the Froglandian Giant Farting Frog, amphibious flatus gigantus.

It’s only words,

And words are all She has

To take your lame away

(w apologies to no beegees (and deep and undying gratitude for the Fair Use Doctrine))

Geez, if that’s what the French call English tourists, I hate to think what they call Americans. On the other hand, if you learn even a little French, Parisians will fall over themselves to help you. The more French you know, the sweeter time you will have there. Pouvez-vous dire que j’aime y aller?

“Keep your mouth shut or you’ll catch a Dybbuk.”

I’m a British and I’m very very rude

I hate the foreigners, hate their stinking food.

I don’t like French or Gemans, or care for Belgians much

But most of all, worst of all, I hate the Dutch.

.

British Tourist by John Dowie on Youtube

Gobermouche = Fly swallower

In a closed mouth no flies enter. Spanish Proverb

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly

I don’t know why she swallowed a fly – Perhaps she’ll die!There was an old lady who swallowed a spiderThat wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her!

She swallowed the spider to catch the fly;I don’t know why she swallowed a fly – Perhaps she’ll die!There was an old lady who swallowed a bird; How absurd to swallow a bird!

She swallowed the bird to catch the spiderThat wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her!She swallowed the spider to catch the fly;I don’t know why she swallowed a fly – Perhaps she’ll die!There was an old lady who swallowed a cat; Imagine that! She swallowed a cat!

She swallowed the cat to catch the bird,She swallowed the bird to catch the spiderThat wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her!She swallowed the spider to catch the fly;I don’t know why she swallowed a fly – Perhaps she’ll die!There was an old lady that swallowed a dog; What a hog, to swallow a dog!

She swallowed the dog to catch the cat,She swallowed the cat to catch the bird,She swallowed the bird to catch the spiderThat wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her!She swallowed the spider to catch the fly;I don’t know why she swallowed a fly – Perhaps she’ll die!There was an old lady who swallowed a goat; She just opened her throat and swallowed a goat!

She swallowed the goat to catch the dog,She swallowed the dog to catch the cat,She swallowed the cat to catch the bird,She swallowed the bird to catch the spiderThat wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her!She swallowed the spider to catch the fly;I don’t know why she swallowed a fly – Perhaps she’ll die!There was an old lady who swallowed a cow; I don’t know how she swallowed a cow!

There was an old lady who swallowed a horse;

…She’s dead, of course!

I step away for a while … and return to all kinds of talk about FA leaving. What happened?

Shoo fly, don’t bother me is an odd statement for a frog to make.

Angles, Picts, and Celts too.

Processed the squirrels, may they rest in peace, and put them on racks in the smoke house, after seasoning them in a specially concocted marinade with an old family recipe that only I possess. That’s the secret, you know. Road’s Kill Squirrel Jerk is a well known name in Froglandia. I cleared enough at the Tadpole Festival to take a year off. Sure, the competition cleaned up the year I wasn’t working, but that’s only going to make Road’s Kill sell better this coming season. And there is no reason to get greedy. That takes the fun out of it all, anyway. I’m going to take my sabbatical year’s experiences and apply them toward my exhibit for the next Festival of Fecal Plumage. I’ve developed a way to make a paintable canvas-like surface from comix brush. It just came back to me now. It will be totally awesome at the art crawl bonfire. Thin and porous, it will provide enough improved surface area to burn quite nicely, while still having a surface that lends itself to expressive strokes. I really need to work on paints and textiles that will improve the pyrotechnic display as well. I’m getting some great ideas from all these lateral me memories, though I’m not sure that all of them will work in this reality. There does seem to be some slight variance in the fundamental underpinnings of physics between consensus nodes. If I’m not mistaken, there is a gradient density from edge to center, like with any globular form. This suggests the physical realities are based on a standardized template that transcends our multiverse.

Brutal Saxons! —I’m sure the Royal Family like that.

Probably almost everyone has swallowed either a fly or some other bug. Grandma used to say that everyone eats a bushel of dirt in his lifetime. I think she was right. At least a bushel. If you wake up the next morning, no harm was done (to you; can’t say the same for the fly). Grandma was Italian, born in the Old Country….

Mr. Ushindi:

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Fair’s fair, really.

La perfide Albion! The French have never forgotten nor forgiven what happened at Agincourt.

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!