Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for March 30, 2008

Transcript:

Danny Donkey was sad. Sad because everyone around him was good-looking. And he was not. So Danny Donkey went to genie and asked to be good-looking. "That is too much work on my part," said the genie. "But I can give you this." And with that, the genie handed over what appeared to be some magical rod, and told Danny what it was and how to use it. And so, later that day, Danny went out and hit every good-looking person he could find with his very own Ugly Stick. KONK "Because, kids, if you can't make yourself better, make those around you worse." "This is NOT going in a children's book." "Hey... maybe I got hit by that thing."