Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for August 20, 2014

Exactly how big of a commission do the docs get on each prescription they write?

From the funny farm to the funny pharmacy.

5 second rule!

I’ll have whatever the Rep is having.

Ain’t just the pharmaceutical reps that push pills. That’s pretty much the answer for everything these days. It’s a lot easier to diagnosis everything so it can be solved with pills than to handle it. And I’m not just talking medical.

Side effects include, but are not limited to, stammering, and inability to maintain a grasp on very small objects.

Bring back Pigita and cheese! :)

Run, Fred! Find a real doctor! Rat the Imposter will be too busy scooping up fallen pills to notice that you’ve gone!

Pills before swine?

After a long spell without a checkup, I visited a doctor on a recommendation. He told me I could reverse my borderline high cholesterol/blood sugar numbers with diet and exercise. Boy, what a quack.

Do doctors evenl wear that mirror thing anymore?

@John Smith—perhaps Fred is being transformed into Fredricka?!?

yesterday I went to the Doctor, he told me I didn’t have much longer to live…I laughed, ha ha

I died today RIP

We’re back to this again?

Rat, AKA…

@Gaijinrabbit Remember what the door mouse said Feed your head.Feed your head.

That’s not a Pharma rep. Pharma reps are blonde former cheerleaders and they rarely know anything about the product they’re selling.

Cigarette companies used to do that.

Pink gown maybe — but I’d be more concerned that there’s no sanitary paper covering the bed. There’s a naked butt crack in direct contact there…

He gets a commission from your gym.

It’s true that all drug companies bribe doctors, but not all doctors take bribes. Probably not much more than 67% of them!

Medicine has been usurped by MBA’s and pharmaceutical companies.

Thankfully, doctors are starting to fight back.

True, so many medical companies and doctors, researchers are looking for pills to sell, not cures or treatments. Sad state of affairs.

Oh yes. Very professional!

xxx

Could be worse; he could be yelling “Shots! Shots!” and throwing hypodermic needles.

Doctors should not prescribe; pharmacists should. Pharmacists keep up with their industry; doctors are overwhelmed. Plus, we could alleviate much of the pressure on medical spending if we were able to bypass the physician-gatekeeper.

Didn’t this series start in January or something?

he just a homeless dude