Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for January 02, 2020

There are so few kale smoothie drinkers that it really isn’t worth the effort.

Kale them all.

I LIKE kale smoothies…

Remember when they told you eating fat was bad for you and it turned out it wasn’t? Remember when they told you certain fruits (blueberries) and vegetables (kale) were superfoods and it turned out they are no better than almost all other fruits and vegetables? Remember when they told you to stop eating red meat because white meat is so much healthier and it turned out there is no difference (it’s okay if you don’t remember that one — the results have just been published)?

Humans are omnivores — we can eat anything and thrive on it. There are families in India who proudly proclaim they have not touched meat in four hundred years (I’ve met them) and there are, or at least were, Inuit who lived healthy lives on nothing but seal meat and fish. Let’s face it, an average teenager consumes a diet that would make a buzzard puke.

So go ahead and destroy people who drink kale smoothies. It will make absolutely no difference.

“Everyone’s just human.”

Said the rat to the goat.

Mother used to make me eat kale in soup. Had a NICE nursing home picked out for her but she died first.

destroy them just for the kale of it…

There are people who like kale smoothies? I just can’t swallow that.

Finally a good reason for the peoples of the world to come together.

Helpful tip when cooking kale. Coat the pan with olive oil, and the kale will slide out into the trash bin much easier.

And bad people who eat at McDonalds everyday

After all, you are what you eat

Don’t blame all religions, Rat. We know which austere scholarly religion is causing the most trouble worldwide today.

There are two kinds of people in this world. Those who think the world can be divided into two types of people, and those who don’t.

(Personally, I’d divide them into those who use hot water to brush their teeth and those who use cold.)

Thank heavens you’re only a rat, Rat!

And Rat was doing so good at the beginning!

Is it not terrible, all those people deciding for themselves what to believe in? Who is the idiot came up with “free will” anyway?

Oh please Rat, it is not as if they are enjoying life.

What’s wrong with Kale? Trader Joe’s used to carry a Kale and spinach pie that was delicious!

Don’t know about a smoothie but kale is great in a salad … Croc Power !

I’ve had kale so seldom, and in such small quantities, that I really have no idea what it’s like. But I think I’d try it on a salad rather than making a “smoothie” with it.

Goat’s idea in panel 2 shows he doesn’t understand the problem described in panel 1.

Ewwwwwwwwwwww

You should see hardcore fans who have ridiculously high expectations and complain about every little thing.

But that would put all the kale farmers out of business! They couldn’t clothe or feed their children!!! WON’T SOMETHING THINK ABOUT THE CHILDREN!!!!?!?!?!?!?!!

Again… what the heck is Kale, anyway??

If they drink that they will destroy themselves,

By now Paris should know that there’s nothing “normal” when Rat is involved!

Both wrong. The only division that matters is the one between us and us. “The line between good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being.”—Alexander Solzhenitsyn

Goat hit on it right. But the Division between Males and Females will be the hardest one to break down given how much it seems to matter.

I don’t know. I think I’m with Rat on this one.

Hopefully, science will discover that too much kale makes the drinker and all his/her descendants sterile.

I’m with Rat. Where do we meet up with the pitchforks and torches?

Steal their lemon juice so all that iron in the kale won’t be absorbed. They will have suffered for nothing! I like most greens, just not as smoothies. My traditonal New Years collards were delicious. I’m not a jerk cyclist, however, so I’m not that evil.

I thought it was people who hang toilet paper in over the top fashion vs those who hang it to flow underneath.

There is only ONE divide that matters to me: donnydrone or not donnydrone. The later make up every other evil group, like anti-semites, anti-women, anti-black people, et cetera. I couldn’t care less about different races and different religions, insomuch as I just want them to live comfortably.;)

Abraham Lincoln: “A house divided against itself cannot stand." Our dollar is based on nothing. Our values are based on half-truths, innuendo, and the same crazy ideas which drove God’s Stiff Necked Children, and --.

I refuse to spend a whole day worrying about something I don’t like.

Even one kale smoothie drinker is too many.

As usual rat is on to something.

Bon Appetit You Tube is featuring Kale Pesto today!

Who was the first guy that thought kale was a food, and why didn’t he warn others.

I’m a health food nut who eats almost nothing but organic fruits & veggies, local pastured meats, wild fish, seed grains and whole foods that I make from scratch. But I wouldn’t touch kale with a 10-foot pole, blech!

“Almost” is more normal than you should expect from Rat. But he is a tricky little sophist….

Eh, it’s the bananas, orange juice sometimes a dollop of raspberry sherbet just for an added layer and kale either green or red (purple really) I know it’s only roughage. You have to heat greens like kale, spinach etc. to get the vitamins to release. Not cooked too much or the vitamins are gone, just heat them a little, enough that they are bright colored. I mix chopped kale with ground lamb, potatoes, onion, garlic, salt and pepper. Delicious.

so count olaf drinks kale smoothies?

jef the cyclist and his friends