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Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for December 08, 2017
Transcript:
annual handy candy halloween treat giving guide pikachu: i'm a pokemon! how trite! he gets a circus peanut. knock-off: i'm a harry potter knock-off! that's more like it! give him some genetically-engineered candy corn. goiter: i'm a big goiter! give her some quinine. ghost: i'm a ghost! unimaginative and hazardous. give him one pez, tops. child: i'm at at-risk child of divorce, poor child-care & slack school standards whose self-destruc-tive impulses lead me to dangerous costume choices. scary! give him some ritalin.
Sisyphos about 7 years ago
Bah, humbug! Leave the lights off, the curtain drawn, the door locked, and eat all the candy yourself!