Rip Haywire by Dan Thompson for September 25, 2016

Transcript:

Voice: That's Tahiti and his body-guards! Voice 2: Kiwi?! Kiwi, are you in there? Who's in there with you? Rip Haywire: I can't risk capture, kid. We need to go. Woman: I can't go back to my village unless Tahiti Jones is dead. Voice 3: Someone is on the roof! Rip Haywire: And I wanted a cabbage patch koosa when I was a kid, but I got an AK-47 instead! Woman: Seriously? Those things were plush and plastic nightmare fuel! Rip Haywire: They weren't creepy, they were adorable! Now, Jump! Our daring escape has been blocked by goons! Stop, drop, and roll, kid.... While I... clear the road... of traffic. Get behind me. Woman: Those were the best goons on the island! Wh-who are you? Rip Haywire: Name's Haywire. And in my line of work, that's called "Light Roughhousing."