Shoe by Gary Brookins and Susie MacNelly for August 19, 2009

“New one”? I’d settle for a reconditioned one.

You should never throw anything out until you have a replacement.

Hey, I keep saying we should have zip in parts. When an old part wears out - zip….and in goes the new one.

Especially troublesome when one has to carry those heavy sandwiches.

Every once in a while my back gives up on me. I, too, wish for a replacement part.

You know you are old when:

YOUR BACK GOES OUT MORE OFTEN THAN YOU DO.

You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.

You buy a compass for the dash of your car/truck.

You’re proud of your lawn mower.

Your best friend is dating someone half their age, and isn’t breaking any laws.

Your arms are almost too short to read the newspaper.

You sing along with the elevator music.

You would rather go to work than stay home sick.

You enjoy hearing about other people’s operations.

You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

People call at 9:00 p.m. and ask, “Did I wake you?”

You answer a question with, “Because I said so.”

You send money to PBS.

The end of your tie doesn’t come anywhere near the top of your pants.

You take a metal detector to the beach.

You know what the word “equity” means.

You can’t remember the last time you laid on the floor to watch television.

Your ears are hairier than your head.

You talk about “good grass” and you’re referring to someone’s lawn.

You get into a heated argument about pension plans.

You got cable for The Weather Channel.

You can go bowling without drinking.

You have a party and the neighbors don’t even realize it.

You find yourself smiling at this list.

It only looks like one phrase to me ;-)

cogent - you are correct.

I could probably check off about 90% of the stuff on Cogent’s list.

cogent, i like the fifth one best! wish i could resemble it (not really, what would we have in common?)

maybe that’s another sign of aging. looking for more than physical attractiveness in someone of the opposite gender.

Ah, the human spine. The single best evidence we have against the theory of Intelligent Design (followed closely by the human knee).

Great list cogent. One would have to be older than dirt, however, to think “good grass” means I am talking about my lawn.

SMILING!

I just recently went to a Crosby Stills Nash concert. I was on the younger side of that crowd.

good list Cogent!

Probably those days of break-dancing have finally caught up with you, Roz! :-)

fritzoid, it wouldn’t say much for the survival of the fittest either… emphasis on FIT. ;-)

Well, by the time your back and knees go you’ve probably already passed the prime reproductive years, so it’s a tough gene to weed out. Like Huntington’s Chorea (Woody Guthrie’s disease); if your dad had it, there’s a 50% chance that you’ll get it (if you’re male), but you don’t know whether you’ve dodged that bullet until late in life. If you DON’T develop it then your sons are safe, but if you DO then your sons face that same uncertainty.

Okeedoekee, just wondering what happened to Young. Oops, Just gave away my age.

You know you’re getting old when one of your kids goes bald. Especially the boy.