Speed Bump by Dave Coverly for August 04, 2009

Don’t forget to do something REEAALLY embarrassing in front of all her friends. :D

drive her to school in my ‘78 volvo.

And kiss her goodbye in front of everyone when you drop her off at school.

…wearing shorts, with white socks and sandals. Oh, and don’t forget the 1960’s iPod - a 7 transistor AM radio with a white earbud and cord.

the kiss at school is the ultimate. But being drug around the mall could be worse if it is a saturday .

Be sure to show her baby pictures to all her classmates for good measure

And ask such questions as: “Simone? Isn’t that the boy you told me you have a crush on?”

NOOOOOOO!!! Please. please anything but that!!

Boy, THAT made Simone’s eyes bulge. (And don’t forget to try to talk “cool”, you know, use a lot of teenage slang - that will impress Simone and her friends no end)

That’ll fix her. Never would have taught me anything, though, I was never cool, and didn’t care what anyone thought of me. High school was a breeze. :)

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

that’s child abuse