That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for September 26, 2022

Not fair! It’s 3 against 1!

To heck with the game, just kiss him already.

The game 3 seconds before Rusty knocks the game board off of the table…

/// Both these Chess Players have different styles.

Gray haired Ned will rely on his wiles.

Practiced hundreds of weeks,

mastered classic techniques,

and won every time in early trials.

/// Ned’s opponent is backed by his beau.

Both try mind tricks to bring Ned down low.

Concentration they’d break;

make Ned make a mistake

staring deep and hard right at their foe.

/// If they both with Ned seem to be flirting,

they hope Ned’s chess game soon will be hurting.

They assume that Ned’s straight

and he won’t call out “mate”

if he finds this dark queen disconcerting.

Guy in the back thinking: “You took the Bishop’s bishop, you’ll never live to be a knight.”

The artist, sick of models who kept moving, finally found the perfect subjects.

I’m with the wireless anal beads. His king is in check, so taking the knight would not be a legal move. He has to move out of check (or interpose his rook, but that just leads to losing the rook and being in check again).

Hey, this ain’t checkers !

Ah, Ned has taken on the originators of the Queen’s Gambit.

I Google searched the beads……Wish I hadn’t. There are things in life I really don’t want to know about.

I learn a lot of pop culture from the gocomics contributors, and here’s another learning moment for me. So I now know what these little rascals are, but the big news is that you can buy them on both Amazon and Walmart’s websites, among other places. Walmart? Really? (Cue Little Rascals-esque double-take)

is that a remote in her hand?

I thought boxing was the only sport with a corner man.

Andre, we did not invite you here solely to play chess. We were wondering…..well, Spot here was wondering…..if you were interested in a foursome?

Ah… Carlsen against Niemann, next round

The game is so exciting that the lady and the dog are watching the painter. And so the expression, ’Watching paint dry".

It was a long tournament and they had to use the beads that took D cells.

Unfortunately it is not hard to believe the game has recently come to this. But then, I’m sure seeking any advantage has always been a thing.

Bobby decided the only way to help Lancelot and distract Rudolph was to go as Roberta. So far it was working.

Excuse me sir, the Lady Miriam is here for her daily chest game….

Long tired of the stuffiness of chess society, Alexander entertained himself (and annoyed his opponents) with terminology such as “horsey takes castle’s little guy”.

Nigel, is that a Killer Queen in your pocket or do you love me?

Among my youthful misdeeds/

Was learning about anal beads./

But my older mind’s newer/

On more “tasteful” fodder it feeds.

It looks like a father and son/

But what is the other one ?/

In resplendent attire/

“It” flames like a fire..

What, pray, has the artist done?

Chess Players: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:Portrait paintings by James Northcote" site=commons.wikimedia.org 

(syntax supported by the Google, Bing, Yahoo, DuckDuckGo, Ecosia, and Yandex search engines) in the browser address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and choose the first Category: found, and once there find the first Chess text string, and click its link for info and links that point to more info about this painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #3000 (September 26, 2022) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu (even larger if you trim what’s after .png from the URL). I have added a comment there (awaiting Mr. Melcher’s approval) pointing to info about this artist I used to point to here. First work by this artist used here.

I’m sure it’s a pleasure to render/

These garments, replete with splendor/

But dare one inquire/

Re: that radiant attire-/

What on earth is that third person’s gender ?

Check,mate.

“Its” lips are so luscious and red/

They fairly leap out of “its” head !

One imagines the rest/

Must be equally “blest”:/

They can’t wait to get “it” to bed…///

An interesting group, n’est-ce-pas ?/

Une fille, un fils, et Papa ?

Ou Papa et deux fils?

Is this Britain- or Greece?

A unisex ménage a trois !/

Mondo Cane Redux

.

Poker is my game, the little dog thinks

Chess is a game for the Cat, that slinks

So slyly to stalk small mammals and birds,

Softly purrs instead of barking its words

.

No, Chess is so boring and so oblique

Its tactics require one to stealthily sneak

Around in feline-like conspiracy motions

According to obsolete monarchical notions.

.

So, Poker appeals to dogs’ innate natures

The wolf in us hearkens back to those creatures

Not to say that we’re unsubtle,

For that we’d put forth intense rebuttal

.

Chess makes one’s opponent to bleed slowly to death

While Poker rips a throat out to sudden stoppage of breath

Chess is effete to end from beginning

Poker wins are noisy when raking in winnings

//

Oh, heck, in Poker some food falls on the floor

And can an alert dog ask for much more?

I wonder if some time many years hence

An artist with Cool[idge] common sense

Will paint dogs playing poker that folks adore?

Either that or someone’s teasing you.

Michael far left is waiting for his husband to finish the game, so they can go to bed, last night he had to do the dog and Mitsy wasn’t too happy.

Isn’t every instinct telling him to take the queen, and forget about the chess game?