The Flying McCoys by Glenn McCoy and Gary McCoy for February 21, 2022

What is covered (or not covered) by that cloud?

A place where poor eyesight has to be corrected by glasses can’t be heaven.

Burnt offerings.

A singe of regret, perhaps?

I’d say because your pants are on fire but I’m too late for that comment.

Well he can’t lie about it now

Just a wild guess.

Smokin’ in the boys room…

If you can be sure you can get back, it would be interesting. You can have endless fun counting all the televangelists.

Once there were two brothers, Sam and George Pram. In life they were inseparable, but on death George goes to heaven and Sam is sent to the other place. George Pram isn’t truly blissful in heaven without his brother. So George goes to St. Peter and asks if there’s some way he and Sam can visit one another occasionally. St. Peter says “Well, he can’t come up here, but you’re permitted to go down there. But there are three rules: You can’t leave anything behind, you can’t bring anything back with you, and you have to be back here within 24 hours.”

George says he can live with that (so to speak), so he flies down to hell. It turns out that hell isn’t actually that bad – it’s not as nice as heaven, but not much worse than earth. Sam is doing all right (although he missed George as much as George missed Sam). In fact, he’s thriving; he’s opened a popular discotheque, which is the hottest spot in hell (so to speak). Sam says to George “Come on in, I’ll show you around. But can I ask you to leave your wings, halo and harp with the coat-check demon? They really stand out, and it might make the other guests uncomfortable.” George can live with that (so to speak). He and Sam have a great time catching up, drinking, and dancing. George is having so much fun he loses track of time, and when he looks at his watch he realizes he only has half an hour to get back to the pearly gates. He says a quick thank you and goodbye to Sam, rushes to get his things, and flies back to heaven. He gets back to St. Peter with only minutes to spare.

“Did you and Sam have a good visit?” asks St. Peter, " I’m glad. Now let’s get you checked back in. Wait, something’s missing. You’ve got your wings, you’ve got your halo, but where’s your harp?"

“Oh no!” says George…

Sometimes you just have to go check on your friends.

It’s that, or the dryer, for the gowns overheated.

“… that also doesn’t exist.”