New Adventures of Queen Victoria by Pab Sungenis for April 27, 2011

Falkland Islands are nice-

Lard tunderin’ Jayzus bye!

Just give them a toaster or some tupperware. Bet nobody else will think of it.

or, candlesticks ala bull durham. or, one of those scottish isles where sheep outnumber people.

Heard on the news this morning that there’s an idiot priest in England that’s going to have a demonstration on Friday ‘cause he wants to overthrow the royals.

Does he think he will become king?

Any thoughts from across the pond would be appreciated.

Considering their request concerning wedding gifts, is this implying that Newfoundland is a charity case?

If he wants to overthrow the royals, my guess is that he doesn’t want to be king. But maybe Lord Protector.

The American system of having what Bagehot called the ‘dignified’ (head of state) and ‘efficient’ (head of government) elements of our constitution in one person doesn’t work very well, especially after we ignored Washington’s (and Madison’s) advice and adopted the two-party oligarchy system of government. The flag and fireworks and parades are no substitute for a human being who holds his or her position independent of party.

I heard on the radio this morning that they registered for Papua New Guinea.

Such a thoughtful gift! It will go so well with the Channel Islands.

Newfoundland is a beautiful place to visit in the summer. I can hardly wait to see them kiss the cod, drink a glass of schreech and head for George Street.

Is that Newfoundland or a Newfoundland? (Hint: A Newfoundland is bigger).

Perfect. Two young royals in true love. ship them off to the colonies as quickly as possible before the contaminate the whole society.