9 Chickweed Lane by Brooke McEldowney for March 14, 2004
Transcript:
"There he is. He looks harmless, but it's impossible to tell." "One day there'll be a way to find if a guy's a jerk without exposing oneself to personal risk." "You're a visionary." "There's a boy at school... He's nice-looking, but I don't know anything about him." "What if he's a jerk? I wish there was some device for early detection." "During my years of dating, I discovered a magic word, a single utterance that could flush out a jerk the moment it was intoned." "If I was in the presence of a closet jerk, all I had to do was speak it, and he would emerge." "And what is this magic word?" "Hello."