Ballard Street by Jerry Van Amerongen for September 23, 2015

Sherrriiiifffff That sort of thing will NOT be tolerated in my neighborhood. The HOA expressly forbids erecting a tent on ones lawn!

Is that Rumple on the stilts in his skin coloured tights.

Wasn’t it bad enough we have to put up with the Crudlicks and their little enterprise on their front lawn?

One wonders: Is that Larry in the yellow shirt? In the blue tights? The pink dress? Is Larry even in the picture?

Larry’s life has always been a circus, however, he never expected on to spontaneously and furiously erupt on his front lawn.

Poor Larry. He had this premonition that the first day of Autumn would not end well, Little did he know that it wouldn’t begin well, either.

Who knew that The In Your Face, Get Out of My Space Circus would choose to litter his lawn ?

It’s enough to drive a man to drink ! Actually, in Larry’s case, it’s a short putt !

I predict we’ll be seeing Larry at the Tiki quite early today.

On the bright side with a cow there is fertilizer and stilt man will aerate his lawn.

Can’t tell if that’s Ma’s cooking being thrown out or horse flop. Might be little difference.

SHEEESH!jus wen ya thinks thingser gittin bak to normL in the hood…aint gots tyme ta deeal wit this sh….shood hava PERMIT frum teh lesse…. here…yep…crap…. well,seams tehy gots one, jus lass April…“Ferdinand and Belle Ledgerent” applied and reseeved an Annul Usage Permit fer mobile entertainment and yard restoration bidness…. um…stamped PAID, initialed by “S.S.” permit ledger sez roomy tents (?) $138.33 an speshul youse parkinG Permit as needed… wha..???

You just never know what you are going to wake up to on Ballard Street! Mist – agree!

He sure could tickle the funny-bone, couldn’t he? Here’s some quotes attributed to Yogi Berra: 1. When you come to a fork in the road, take it.2. You can observe a lot by just watching.3. It ain’t over till it’s over.4. It’s like déjà vu all over again.5. No one goes there nowadays, it’s too crowded.6. Baseball is ninety percent mental and the other half is physical.7. A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore.8. Always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t come to yours.9. We made too many wrong mistakes.10. Congratulations. I knew the record would stand until it was broken.11. You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I’m not hungry enough to eat six.12. You wouldn’t have won if we’d beaten you.13. I usually take a two-hour nap from one to four.14. Never answer an anonymous letter.15. Slump? I ain’t in no slump… I just ain’t hitting.16. How can you think and hit at the same time?17. The future ain’t what it used to be.18. Geico commercial. “They give you cash, which is as good as money.” 19. It gets late early out here.20. If the people don’t want to come out to the ballpark, nobody’s going to stop them.21. We have deep depth.22. Pair up in threes.23. Why buy good luggage, you only use it when you travel.24. You’ve got to be very careful if you don’t know where you are going, because you might not get there.25. During Spring Training, a reporter asked Yogi, “What size cap do you wear?” “I don’t know” he said, “I’m not in shape yet.”26. Even Napoleon had his Watergate.27. A reporter once asked Yogi, “What would you do if you found a wallet with a million dollars in it?”Yogi: “I’d see if I could find the guy that lost it. If he was poor, I’d give it back to him.”28. He hits from both sides of the plate. He’s amphibious.29. It was impossible to get a conversation going, everybody was talking too much.30. I can see how he (Sandy Koufax) won twenty-five games. What I don’t understand is how he lost five.31. I don’t know (if they were men or women fans running naked across the field). They had bags over their heads.32. I’m a lucky guy and I’m happy to be with the Yankees. And I want to thank everyone for making this night necessary.33. I’m not going to buy my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did.34. In baseball, you don’t know nothing.35. I never blame myself when I’m not hitting. I just blame the bat and if it keeps up, I change bats. After all, if I know it isn’t my fault that I’m not hitting, how can I get mad at myself?36. I never said most of the things I said.37. It ain’t the heat, it’s the humility.38. If you ask me anything I don’t know, I’m not going to answer.39. I wish everybody had the drive he (Joe DiMaggio) had. He never did anything wrong on the field. I’d never seen him dive for a ball, everything was a chest-high catch, and he never walked off the field.40. So I’m ugly. I never saw anyone hit with his face.41. Take it with a grin of salt.42. (On the 1973 Mets) We were overwhelming underdogs.43. The towels were so thick there I could hardly close my suitcase.44. Little League baseball is a very good thing because it keeps the parents off the streets.45. Mickey Mantle was a very good golfer, but we weren’t allowed to play golf during the season; only at spring training.46. If I didn’t wake up, I’d still be sleeping.47. (Ring…ring..ring…ring..) Yogi answers “’hello”. The caller says, “Gee Yogi. I hope I didn’t wake you up.” Yogi says, “Nah, I had to get up to answer the phone anyway.”48. OK, OK, everybody listen up… I want everybody to line up alphabetically, according to your height!49. If the world were perfect, it wouldn’t be.50. A lot of guys go, ‘Hey, Yogi, say a Yogi-ism.’ I tell ’em, ‘I don’t know any.’ They want me to make one up. I don’t make ’em up. I don’t even know when I say it. They’re the truth. And it is the truth. I don’t know.

Ain’t NEVER seen no fancy yurt before.

Got a $65 contribution last night after i went to bed.Woo Hoo!

Didn’t “Belligerent Circus” open for “Metallica” on their tour in the late ’90’s?

Belligerent Little Circus would be an excellent name for a rock band.

Not your usual Ballard St Dog & Pony show.

OMG my father actually had a package of these!I remember thinking it was hilarious when I was about 8.Exactly how old are you?

On a brighter note………….