Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for January 02, 2011

Transcript:

Hangover Cures for New Year's Day In ancient times it was believed that a hangover was caused by "spirits" who lived in the bottle. When disturbed, these spirits would lodge in your skull, push all the furniture out of the way ad commence to rassle. To evict them you would need to dig a hole at a busy crossroads and toss the bottle in. Given the state of many of our local roads this should be a snap. Man: Who threw this? You? Drunk: Please, not so loud. Some lizards can slow their metabolisms to the point where the circulation practically stops. You should try this! This is a holistic approach, and may be supplemented with a diet of shredded lettuce and live crickets.