Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for May 14, 2005

Transcript:

"Dear Tiger Woods, Okay dude, what's your problem? A few weeks ago, I mock you for no longer winning tournaments...the next day, you win the masters...that was an obvious attempt to show me up." "In order to resolve what has now become a very public feud between the two of us, I suggest one of the following: either (A), you give me 25% of the $1.26 million that I inspired you to win at the masters; or (B) we fight in the church parking lot after school." "...It worked in junior high."