Rip Haywire by Dan Thompson for May 03, 2014

Whoooooa mass carbo addiction?!?!?!?!

oh no

At least she isn’t mad at him anymore.

Run Rip Run! KA-Skeddadle!!!! FAT Girl, Twelve O’clock Rip!!!!!

I feel sorry for the helicopter.

I thought we already saw Cobra.

There’s a certain Queen song running through my head…

Quick, Rip! Run to Over the Hedge and pull the “It was all a dream” lever.

Well, this tale has certainly taken an unexpected twist… Breezy, more like Windy now… will definitely need a bigger chopper…

Ok, we get that something is amiss. How long will this get dragged out?

Rip… As tempting as it is, you do NOT want to run. She’s finally willing to talk to you after the last time you made a run for it. Besides, the last thing she needs is to go to her uncle for more “comfort food”.

I imagined Cobra and Breezy’s weight gain a little differently proportioned.

Rip, If I may offer a suggestion. When you find the (inevitable) cure to this sudden epidemic of obesity, make sure you cure Breezy and not worry about Cobra. It might help you keep from being tempted to stray, which is what got you into the doghouse just a week or two ago, remember?

I’m reminded of a line from my favorite movie, NORTH BY NORTHWEST: “It’s so horribly sad, how is it I feel like laughing?” On the other hand, maybe the townsfolk can starts new plus-size fashions for the lovely ladies!

Oh. My. God.