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âTheyâ are now saying that âit is the number of drinks per seating that determines an alcoholicâ. So I always get up to make a new drink and use the restroom.
From an old Mad Magazine article about the difference between the rich and the poor: âIf youâre poor, youâre a drunk. If youâre rich, you have a well-stocked bar.â
When my mother was newly arrived from England, she told her Canadian friend she was going out to buy âa jointâ (of meat.) The friend truly believed she was going out to invest in a bar!
Barker62 about 10 years ago
I had an uncle like that. He tried to keep the breweries in business the best way he knew how.
Dean about 10 years ago
âTheyâ are now saying that âit is the number of drinks per seating that determines an alcoholicâ. So I always get up to make a new drink and use the restroom.
PICTO about 10 years ago
Iâve got âsaloon arthritisâ. I get stiff in a different joint every night.
Lyons Group, Inc. about 10 years ago
Drunkard!
Observer fo Irony about 10 years ago
Show doesnât need season for a reason he just practices consumption a lot.
paullp Premium Member about 10 years ago
What a great play on words to start the day!
Nighthawks Premium Member about 10 years ago
my joints are usually pretty stiff, until they burn down
J Short about 10 years ago
Patient: Doc, it hurts in these joints. Doc: Stay out of those joints.
The Life I Draw Upon about 10 years ago
It is better to try and fail than fail to try.
Godfreydaniel about 10 years ago
From an old Mad Magazine article about the difference between the rich and the poor: âIf youâre poor, youâre a drunk. If youâre rich, you have a well-stocked bar.â
neverenoughgold about 10 years ago
At my age, Iâm getting stiff in the wrong jointsâŠ
dzw3030 about 10 years ago
Alcoholics go to meetings. Drunks die and sometimes take others with them.
JP Steve Premium Member about 10 years ago
When my mother was newly arrived from England, she told her Canadian friend she was going out to buy âa jointâ (of meat.) The friend truly believed she was going out to invest in a bar!