Somebody had to do it:
The Philosopher’s Song (Monty Python)
Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable.
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could think you under the table.
David Hume could out-consume
Wilhelm Freidrich Hegel,
And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.
There’s nothing Nietzsche couldn’t teach ya’
‘Bout the raising of the wrist.
SOCRATES, HIMSELF, WAS PERMANENTLY PISSED…
John Stuart Mill, of his own free will,
On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.
Plato, they say, could stick it away;
Half a crate of whiskey every day.
Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle,
Hobbes was fond of his dram,
And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart: “I drink, therefore I am”
Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed;
A lovely little thinker but a bugger when he’s pissed!
What is it that makes everyone think that they are compelled to have to answer some charlatan’s question? And you’re not restricted in your answers to “yes” and “no”.
“Ask your next question and THEN I’ll give you my answers to both”.
Or just ignore him.
This is yet more evidence that those with a Philosophy degree can spend lots of time sitting around, thinking deep thoughts - about unemployment.
Back in the (1970’s?) when IBM came up with the slogan “THINK”, they put it everywhere - including some of their building’s restrooms. One employee saw that one of those signs was purposely placed at head level in the mirror, above the sink. So he thought for a moment. And then he posted a sign above the soap dispenser that read “THOAP”.
LittleYipScream over 14 years ago
So whether I answer yes or no to THIS question, my answer to the NEXT question is always yes. There’s no escape from Wittgenstein!
ksoskins over 14 years ago
If you don’t give him your wallet, he’ll slash you with Occam’s Razor.
cutiepie29 over 14 years ago
So, what would his reaction be if I responded with, “I don’t know, maybe?”
ronebofh over 14 years ago
And they said his degree in philosophy would be of no use in making money.
jgcp1 over 14 years ago
… or as Werner Heisenberg would say,
∆X∆P≥h/2or words to that effect.
cantkick over 14 years ago
Simple solution. Answer the first question no. Answer the second HECK NO.
zero over 14 years ago
Brevity is not the soul of Wittgenstein…
Larry Miller Premium Member over 14 years ago
Somebody had to do it: The Philosopher’s Song (Monty Python)
Immanuel Kant was a real pissant Who was very rarely stable. Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar Who could think you under the table. David Hume could out-consume Wilhelm Freidrich Hegel, And Wittgenstein was a beery swine Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.
There’s nothing Nietzsche couldn’t teach ya’ ‘Bout the raising of the wrist. SOCRATES, HIMSELF, WAS PERMANENTLY PISSED…
John Stuart Mill, of his own free will, On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill. Plato, they say, could stick it away; Half a crate of whiskey every day. Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle, Hobbes was fond of his dram, And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart: “I drink, therefore I am” Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed; A lovely little thinker but a bugger when he’s pissed!
lewisbower over 14 years ago
SHIEK If I applied Occam’s Razor, I would see the easiest solution would be to pop the bum in the nose.
Dorian over 14 years ago
cantkick - you beat me to it! Altho my response would be a little more inflammatory. :) 1st question = No 2nd question = Go take a flying leap, buddy!
Daniel Bryner over 14 years ago
How about answering the question with a question.
freeholder1 over 14 years ago
Gordian’s (k)not the puzzle master Wittgenstein is. He keeps you tied up with logic. Then cuts to the chase.
freeholder1 over 14 years ago
Obviously doesn’t have much on his Plato.
MisngNOLA over 14 years ago
The answer is 42.
freeholder1 over 14 years ago
But what does that “think” sign REALLY mean?
treBsdrawkcaB over 14 years ago
What is it that makes everyone think that they are compelled to have to answer some charlatan’s question? And you’re not restricted in your answers to “yes” and “no”.
“Ask your next question and THEN I’ll give you my answers to both”.
Or just ignore him.
This is yet more evidence that those with a Philosophy degree can spend lots of time sitting around, thinking deep thoughts - about unemployment.
treBsdrawkcaB over 14 years ago
Freeholder -
Back in the (1970’s?) when IBM came up with the slogan “THINK”, they put it everywhere - including some of their building’s restrooms. One employee saw that one of those signs was purposely placed at head level in the mirror, above the sink. So he thought for a moment. And then he posted a sign above the soap dispenser that read “THOAP”.
ksoskins over 14 years ago
There is a reasonable alternative to “THINK”.
THINK or THWIM
mrprongs over 14 years ago
The way out is simple. Hand over the wallet, after emptying it out. He asked for your wallet, no what’s in it.