Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal by Zach Weinersmith for March 24, 2015
March 23, 2015
March 25, 2015
Transcript:
Saint Anselm's proof God is the best possible being. Any being would be made better by existence. Therefore, the best possible being must be existent. Therefore, God exists. Saint Anselm's corrollary It doesn't matter if you've never seen her. She's the best girlfriend ever. The best girlfriend ever would exist. Therefore, my girlfriend from Canada who is really hot exists, and we do it all the time.
Brass Orchid Premium Member over 9 years ago
I have absolute knowledge, and it’s “GREAT”!And it can be yours, for only twelve payments of $49.95.Call now! Operators are standing by.But this special television deal will expire at midnight, so HURRY!
stamps over 9 years ago
If god existed, wouldn’t there be a Youtube video by now? Or a TV appearance on Letterman? Or at least a Bible signing.
ziggman14304 over 9 years ago
Nice Avenue Q reference.
Brass Orchid Premium Member over 9 years ago
And if I make any claim to understand god or to know the mind of god I am obviously a huge liar, like you couldn’t tell when I said that I had a really hot girlfriend from Canada and that we “do it” all the time.
Ida No over 9 years ago
Anselm: “And did I mention she’s HOT? She’s the best kind of hot you’ll ever get from a Canadian girl.”
Brass Orchid Premium Member over 9 years ago
It seems to me that most of the elder deities are actually anthropomorphic mnemonic systems for learning basic knowledge of physics and chemistry.The seven abodes of the fallen, the Qliphoth are the seven possible valence shells.The ten emanations or Sephirot of the Kabbalah are the ten valence states possible with eight states with valence shells of eight electrons and two for hydrogen and helium.The story of Ganesha is a description of how electromagnetic fields are produced when a current passes through the electron shell of a conductive element, where Ganesha is the electron shell and all valence bonding, which enables all electrochemical interaction.It seems to all be an attempt to pass advanced technical knowledge in the absence of a technological society capable of maintaining a manufacturing and educational base.And I would have gotten away with it too, if it hadn’t been for those meddling kids and their stupid dog.