Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for November 17, 2016

Transcript:

summer weeding guide boorish ivy - if ignored will quickly grow into the shape of unwanted lawn objects (flamingo, chevy up on blocks, and large abandoned appliance). especially unnerving for those under autocratic neighborhood associations. flower 1: tie his shoelaces together! flower 2: pure evil! dandelion.org - densely intertwined root system creates a sentient hive-mind prone to acts of petty maliciousness. sphincterwort - (methanium) an entirely unnecessary evolutionary development. too nasty to even draw. touchyweed - oversensitive to the needs of rootbound americans. runs screaming to the aclu when pulled up. rakeseed - step on it and the stalk flies up and hits you in the face! nature at its most palyful! farmer: owch