Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for October 11, 2020
October 10, 2020
October 12, 2020
Transcript:
memorial designs unveiled the committee for a memorial to failed presidential candi-dates today enveiled the top three designs for the memorial which will take up all that empty land on the ellipse. third place - "the big whack-a-mole." visitors would use mallets rented from a little park service kisok to smack down busts of failed candidates as they emerged randomly from holes in the ground. committee chairman wally brown found this one "too gallagheresque." second place - "the candidate who fell to earth & went boom." a strong piece, yet "tpp reminiscent of 'the awakening' on hains point," says chairman brown. pigeon thomas dewey hubert humphrey alf landon pat buchanan first place - "dogpile!" the winning design depicts a swarm of over 1,200 candidates fighting to reach the top of an ionic column. "congratula-tions to mrs. adams's 7th grade art class for this fine entry." says brown. "it melds jeffersonian classicism with rodinian drama. and i really like the part where h. ross perot is chewing off lyndon larouche's leg."
Cpeckbourlioux over 4 years ago
One good idea from Gallagher, I remember. Everybody gets a dart-gun in their car. The darts have little flags that say “Stupid!” You see somebody do something dumb in traffic, you tag their car. If the cops see a car with three darts, its “Pull the car over! “ I always liked that idea.
Sisyphos over 4 years ago
That winning design is chilling in its Truthy Reality. In the hands of a competent bronze caster and marble cutter, it could become an instant classic!
DCBakerEsq over 4 years ago
Anyone interested in becoming President should be banned from running. A simple bottomless pit should suffice. Practical, too!