FoxTrot Classics by Bill Amend for March 15, 2021

oh-no

Is Roger going to make money selling a cure for baldness?

Infomercials? Uhhh, no. If what those hucksters are selling are such a sure money-maker, why would they share it with people who might cut into their profits by doing it better?

How to make a million dollars: First, get a million dollars….

Well, Andi, you could try getting a real job. What exactly do you do? The kids aren’t babies. All we see is you sitting around finding disgusting things to try to force your family to eat.

Don’t listen to the informercial guy. The telemarketer has a much better financial plan for you.

The guy on the infomercial wants your money.

“Beware the advice of successful people. They do not seek your company.”

-Dogbert

Dad is going to make life worse.

I won’t spoil this storyline. But in the end, it tells you all you need to know about get rich quick infomercials.

ruh roh

I just knew that the wedge and cap technique would work.

“No need to worry! I just downloaded Mistplay on my phone!”

I thought he was going to say Jason…

I love the financial experts who say “First, pay off all your credit cards.” Right, cause we all have the much disposable income laying around.

I remember when my parents tried Amway. I was pretty young, and thought “ We’re gonna be rich!”

Jeez. This is going from bad to worse.

Infomercial guy and me together do not bode well in any sentence…..

What he needs is a Nigerian prince.