Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for January 06, 2007

Transcript:

Tom the Dancing Bug's Super-Fun-Pak Comix Edited by Ruben Bolling Rick N' Nick (The Only Comic That Pledges Never To Use The *-Word) Rick: What IS the *-word? Nick: I can't SAY! Rick: Is it the R-word? Nick: No. Rick: The T-word? Nick: No. Rick: The D-word? Nick: No. Rick: Is it the...uh...maybe I shouldn't even... Nick: THAT'S THE ONE! Hey! Are you THINKING the *-word? STOP IT! Robot Doctor: There! I just finished the world's first robot! Robot: --BZZT-- Where is my god? Doctor: God? I am your creator! Robot God: Here I am. Robot: Out of my way, human. Nate The Neoconservative Man: Does your dog bite? Nate: No. Man: You said your dog didn't bite! Nate: Well, he's not really biting your leg -- it's more of a clamping action, and decides everyone didn't bite French. An Would you groin inst G-Rated Pornographic Comics Woman: Hi, I'm your new neighbor. LATER Man: Gosh, you sure are friendly. Man #2: Hi. Woman #2: Hi. Much LATER Man: What a remarkably friendly and affectionate group! Marital Mirth Man: These eggs are burnt. Man: And this coffee has polonium-210 in it, doesn't it? Man: Nice try. Uncle Cap'n's Puzzle Pontoon Uncle Cap'n: Put on yer thinkin' caps, kids. Can you solve the... PYRAMID PUZZLE? Okay, ya scurvy scabs. Here's what ya do: put a five dollar bill in an envelope, and send it to me. Then send a letter to wenty of yer friends and tell them to do these two things: (1) Send me five dollars, and (2) Send a letter to twenty of THEIR friends telling THEM to send me five bucks. No--MAKE THAT TEN BUCKS. Now, go do it! Yes, right NOW, ya stupid twerp! Uncle Cap'n P.O. Box 579A Encino, CA 91416 Boy: Uncle Cap'n, that's not a puzzle. It's not even a proper pyramid scheme. It's a series of illegal demands. Uncle Cap'n: Wrong answer, snot. And now you're on "the list."