F Minus by Tony Carrillo for July 22, 2011

that leaves just beer

i can live with that

Whatever happened to “everything in moderation”?

I’ll continue with everything in moderation. If I listened to all this stuff, I’d be afraid to eat or drink anything and I’d be dead!!

I prefer the “See Food Diet”.

THIS JUST IN!!!!!

A new study has determined that laboratory mice cause cancer in laboratory mice.

Not just every food, every*thing*!

Yep, every food causes cancer… didn’t you know that?!?

Sounds like a Very Mary-Kate’s ‘Mary Kate-kins Diet": 1. Look at food 2. Touch the food you looked at 3. Smell the food you just touched 4. Listen to the sound of you touching the food you touched 5. Then you just don’t eat itAnd don’t forget the supplemental, “Smoothies for When You’re Woozies”I blame CollegeHumor.com for all of this…

when in doubt accuse it causes cancer

Well, it’s true. If you eat food, eventually you die.

…and if you don’t eat, you———-die!

birth causes death……..in the end.

I’ve been waiting for this announcement! It had to come….

My husband’s favorite to “it causes cancer” was “saliva swallowed in small amounts over a period of time causes cancer.”

Must be FOX News.

A doctor told writer D.M. Pinkwater, “your diet is going to kill you.” His response: “So is being mortal.”

This just in…some comic strips are a waste of time to read. -http://about.me/booksatthebeach