Big Nate by Lincoln Peirce for November 30, 1997

Transcript:

Biff: Hello, friends, I'm BIFF BIFFWELL! You remember me from such TV specials as "REAL-LIFE UGLY DIVORCES" and "WHEN HOUSEPLANTS DIE"? Well tonight we'll travel to a world even MORE bizarre and unsettling! Yes, we'll see what occurs..."WHEN TEENS DATE"! Let's meet a REAL teenage couple ELLEN and GORDIE! Like countless young lovebirds, Ellen and Gordie THINK they have a lot in common! Gordie: I can't believe we BOTH like "Party Of Five"! Ellen: We BELONG together! Biff: But beneath this superficial facade lurk a great many DIFFERENCES waiting to be exposed! The truth is: Ellen and Gordie's fairy-tale romance is a ticking TIME BOMB! To see how long it takes for this "relationship" to unravel, we'll introduce an EXTERNAL STRESS into their environment! Watch what happens!' Ellen: What's your problem, brat? Scram! Nate: Hey, I can hang out here if I want! It's MY house, too! Gordie: Aw...let him stay. Ellen: Oh, THAT'S nice! Take HIS side! Nate: Six...seven...eight...