Drabble by Kevin Fagan for July 11, 2019

Ralph, here’s an idea: call the fire department, and have them put out Steinbauer’s barbecue.

Of course, this means WAR.

The neighbor kind of reminds me of Andy Capp.

There was something in a old MAD paperback about backyard barbecues. One about tips on testing the wind direction said, "Smoke may blow into house, forcing you to move barbecue. " Followed by, “Disadvantage of brick barbecue is now obvious. Smoke may blow into neighbor’s house, forcing you to to move family.” The latter showed something that looked like an episode of “Fear Thy Neighbor” on Investigation Discovery-" the neighbors covered with smoke, and wielding axes!

Did someone turn Wilson from “Home Improvement” evil?

Barbecue smoke always smells best at a distance.

We have a set of neighbors like that, only they’re women. . .

My sprinkler system would be blowing over into his yard.

Fanning the flames, so to speak.

Personally, I don’t see a problem here. The smell of burning charcoal is always welcome to me. In fact I wish I could find air freshener with that scent. But then I’d probable just drool a lot.

My dad used to say smoke blows toward beauty (usually when smoke was blowing in his face).

Ralph should stomp a mud-hole in Steinbauer, then enjoy the time away from his miserable family in the pokey.