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Somebody had to do it:
The Philosopherās Song (Monty Python)
Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable.
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could think you under the table.
David Hume could out-consume
Wilhelm Freidrich Hegel,
And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.
Thereās nothing Nietzsche couldnāt teach yaā
āBout the raising of the wrist.
SOCRATES, HIMSELF, WAS PERMANENTLY PISSEDā¦
John Stuart Mill, of his own free will,
On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.
Plato, they say, could stick it away;
Half a crate of whiskey every day.
Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle,
Hobbes was fond of his dram,
And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart: āI drink, therefore I amā
Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed;
A lovely little thinker but a bugger when heās pissed!
What is it that makes everyone think that they are compelled to have to answer some charlatanās question? And youāre not restricted in your answers to āyesā and ānoā.
āAsk your next question and THEN Iāll give you my answers to bothā.
Or just ignore him.
This is yet more evidence that those with a Philosophy degree can spend lots of time sitting around, thinking deep thoughts - about unemployment.
Back in the (1970ās?) when IBM came up with the slogan āTHINKā, they put it everywhere - including some of their buildingās restrooms. One employee saw that one of those signs was purposely placed at head level in the mirror, above the sink. So he thought for a moment. And then he posted a sign above the soap dispenser that read āTHOAPā.
LittleYipScream over 14 years ago
So whether I answer yes or no to THIS question, my answer to the NEXT question is always yes. Thereās no escape from Wittgenstein!
ksoskins over 14 years ago
If you donāt give him your wallet, heāll slash you with Occamās Razor.
cutiepie29 over 14 years ago
So, what would his reaction be if I responded with, āI donāt know, maybe?ā
ronebofh over 14 years ago
And they said his degree in philosophy would be of no use in making money.
jgcp1 over 14 years ago
ā¦ or as Werner Heisenberg would say,
āXāPā„h/2or words to that effect.
cantkick over 14 years ago
Simple solution. Answer the first question no. Answer the second HECK NO.
zero over 14 years ago
Brevity is not the soul of Wittgensteinā¦
Larry Miller Premium Member over 14 years ago
Somebody had to do it: The Philosopherās Song (Monty Python)
Immanuel Kant was a real pissant Who was very rarely stable. Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar Who could think you under the table. David Hume could out-consume Wilhelm Freidrich Hegel, And Wittgenstein was a beery swine Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.
Thereās nothing Nietzsche couldnāt teach yaā āBout the raising of the wrist. SOCRATES, HIMSELF, WAS PERMANENTLY PISSEDā¦
John Stuart Mill, of his own free will, On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill. Plato, they say, could stick it away; Half a crate of whiskey every day. Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle, Hobbes was fond of his dram, And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart: āI drink, therefore I amā Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed; A lovely little thinker but a bugger when heās pissed!
lewisbower over 14 years ago
SHIEK If I applied Occamās Razor, I would see the easiest solution would be to pop the bum in the nose.
Dorian over 14 years ago
cantkick - you beat me to it! Altho my response would be a little more inflammatory. :) 1st question = No 2nd question = Go take a flying leap, buddy!
Daniel Bryner Premium Member over 14 years ago
How about answering the question with a question.
freeholder1 over 14 years ago
Gordianās (k)not the puzzle master Wittgenstein is. He keeps you tied up with logic. Then cuts to the chase.
freeholder1 over 14 years ago
Obviously doesnāt have much on his Plato.
MisngNOLA over 14 years ago
The answer is 42.
freeholder1 over 14 years ago
But what does that āthinkā sign REALLY mean?
treBsdrawkcaB over 14 years ago
What is it that makes everyone think that they are compelled to have to answer some charlatanās question? And youāre not restricted in your answers to āyesā and ānoā.
āAsk your next question and THEN Iāll give you my answers to bothā.
Or just ignore him.
This is yet more evidence that those with a Philosophy degree can spend lots of time sitting around, thinking deep thoughts - about unemployment.
treBsdrawkcaB over 14 years ago
Freeholder -
Back in the (1970ās?) when IBM came up with the slogan āTHINKā, they put it everywhere - including some of their buildingās restrooms. One employee saw that one of those signs was purposely placed at head level in the mirror, above the sink. So he thought for a moment. And then he posted a sign above the soap dispenser that read āTHOAPā.
ksoskins over 14 years ago
There is a reasonable alternative to āTHINKā.
THINK or THWIM
mrprongs over 14 years ago
The way out is simple. Hand over the wallet, after emptying it out. He asked for your wallet, no whatās in it.