Luann by Greg Evans and Karen Evans for November 03, 2016
November 02, 2016
November 04, 2016
Transcript:
Luann: These are the guys from my art class. Man: I'm Jack. He's Nil. What're ya talkin' about? Bernice: Relationship complexities... jack: what's complex? Ya stay or ya leave! nil: Nice scarf. May I sit? Bernice: I think we're leaving.
LUANN: Oh, poor Bernice! Why, oh why is she alone?!
1) When friends, for instance, Tiffany, do favors for her, such as restyle her hair, Bernice is aggressive, abusive, nasty, and ungrateful.
2) Every time Bernice is alone with Luann, her “friend”, Bernice rags on her, disses her, puts her down, and is in general a critical, front-stabbing, rotten, snarky, buzz-kill jerk.
3) When a man she’s hot for sleeps over on her couch. Bernice dresses herself up in three layers of clothing, covering herself from neck to feet, places a baseball bat by her bed and locks her bedroom door.
4) While Bernice is crying about being lonely, a young, single, man of her age, race, and level of education politely asks to sit down with her in a public place while she is being chaperoned by a friend. How much safer can you get? Bernice basically tells him to drop dead.
5) Bernice diligently patrols the halls of her dorm morning and night, barking, threatening, and leaving notes to full adults that they can’t have friends over, that they cannot have fun, and that they cannot, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, have intimate relations (as if it is any of her business).
6) The only man Bernice has ever felt a compelling, deep attraction for is her own adopted-out, long-lost . . . . brother!
Bernice has been portrayed by the Evansii as a conflicted, angry, emotionally-abusive incestuous bisexual harridan.
That’s why she is alone.