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“Hi, Carolyn: I am getting married to a wonderful man. He is thinking of taking my last name. We both come from traditional backgrounds so this seems like a big deal to the world. Not to us as much.
Over the years he’s grown much closer to my family than I’ve grown to his. He is distanced from his family, but not totally alienated, for a variety of reasons. My last name is not going to be carried on, so that’s part of our thinking.
If he takes my name, how do we share this news without getting into the reasons? We are also worried his parents will be so offended. The reasons all feel really personal."
“Hi, Carolyn: I am getting married to a wonderful man. He is thinking of taking my last name. We both come from traditional backgrounds so this seems like a big deal to the world. Not to us as much.
Over the years he’s grown much closer to my family than I’ve grown to his. He is distanced from his family, but not totally alienated, for a variety of reasons. My last name is not going to be carried on, so that’s part of our thinking.
If he takes my name, how do we share this news without getting into the reasons? We are also worried his parents will be so offended. The reasons all feel really personal."