Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for August 13, 2009

Too true to be funny. So many things (especially for children) are not done anymore because the insurance companies forbid them.

he’s just getting a bit of help with the jump. (and how did you know his name was jack?)

A.

@okeedoekee re yesterday: (attila the honey) you win best pun IMHO.

calamari

Lio’s uncle with Ishmael’s older brother team up for summer employment.

Lots of calamari - might be a bit tough at that size, though.

A sad commentary on these times. When anything you do has to be looked at for potential liability. Even having children’s friends over for dinner & a sleepover.. what if they’re allergic, what if they fall out of bed,etc……. too many people looking for money any way they can get it without having to work for it and too many wanting to live in a “perfect” world where no one is responsible for their own actions. “Its not my fault I burned myself putting a paper cup of hot coffee between my legs, the coffee was too hot!”

Go to Never Land (my ex-home). You never have to worry about liabilities there. You may have to worry about crocodiles, though.

I just hope that that’s his lawyer in the grips of the sea monster. That would be justice.

Yup, the world sure has changed in 20 years. Remember when Halloween actually was something of a holiday? And kids would go out by themselves in groups of friends?

Avolunteer, while there are a lot of suits such as you describe (locally, the town had to stop making snow for sledding at a local park after a lady in her 40s hit a bump and fractured her ankle, and sued), the McDonald’s Coffee Case is in fact legit, and everyone should take a look to put this particular canard to rest:

“There is a lot of hype about the McDonalds’ scalding coffee case. No one is in favor of frivolous cases of outlandish results; however, it is important to understand some points that were not reported in most of the stories about the case. McDonalds coffee was not only hot, it was scalding – capable of almost instantaneous destruction of skin, flesh and muscle. Here’s the whole story…”

http://www.lectlaw.com/files/cur78.htm

In some states there are good samaritan laws that protect first responders from lawsuits. When I was trained as an EMT for a volunteer rescue squad back in the 70’s I was warned not to stop for an accident in Virginia because there was (and still is) no good samaritan law. So, if some harm comes of your best attempt to assist, you can be sued. Take your pick. Whatever help you can get, or maybe a jackpot if someone is stupid enough to stop and try to help. If you survive long enough for someone stupid enough to stop. Ask your local rescue unit, (they know), if there are good samaritan laws, and if this scares you, write your state legislators.

Tobey Keith speaks on this subject in a new song thats now getting airplay. It mentions the ‘coffee incident’. Oh,Pittsburgh filled in one of their swimming pools,paved it and installed a water park,like walking thru a car wash sans soap. No Lifeguards, no legal troubles……..YET!

Ishmael get back to your own strip…..shame on you!

“We’re gonna need a bigger lifeguard…”

I just dumped my house insurance company because they got in a tizzy over a trampoline, which had been used maybe 5 times in 2 years. The policy made no mention of trampolines, or anything else specific. It was so vaguely and ambiguously worded that it could mean anything they wanted it to, which wasn’t encouraging should there ever be a claim. If they would tell people “no trampolines” in the invoices, think how much trouble they would save themselves. As Doctor Strangelove said, “Why didn’t you tell the world?” The trampoline cloths have become greenhouse and garden shade cloths, and the frame will become a hoop house or storage shed, or maybe an enclosure for a fig tree. The new insurance company is only concerned about woodstoves.

All he would do was tell you to sue the octopus anyway.

Sort of like the medical insurance business, isn’t it?

So that isn’t the lawyer the octopus has? Too bad…

Either calamari or octopus grabs the right person for lawyer or attorney.

And the warning labels, many obviously there for the lawyers’ benefit:

On a hair dryer: Warning: Never use hair dryer while sleeping.

On a windshield sun screen: WARNING:  Do not drive with sunshield in place.

and so on…

Thanks, Stevarino - saved me having to do that. And, of course, those infamous (and totally false) “Stella Awards” which make their way around the internet once or twice a year are named after that poor woman. Hint: when you read on the internet about a lady putting her RV on cruise control and going back to make coffee, crashing, suing and getting gazillions of dollars, uh, uh - ain’t true. Insurance companies again, trying to sway public opinion against valid damage claims. Go to snopes.com to check anything like that. Insurance companies are in business to MAKE money, not pay it. You are NOT in good hands.

His name IS Jack yyyguy, and prior to this, he climbed a beanstalk, preached in a pulpit, carved lanterns, and was very nimble.

Tink, Never Never Land is Florida?