Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for August 30, 2009
Transcript:
Goat says, "What are you doing, Rat?" Rat says, "I have decided to become an ascetic monk. I renounce all the trappings of this worldly life. I shall henceforth love in the forest." Goat says, "How are you gonna eat?" Rat says, "I shall eat what the forest provides. I think I've seen enough 'Man Vs. Wild' on 'Discovery' to make that possible." Goat says, "But you'll starve." Rat says, "No. For if it comes right down to it, I shall call the pizza delivery guy." Goat says, "You can't order a pizza." Rat says, "I can with my 'iPhone.'" Goat says, "You can't bring an 'iPhone'." Rat says, "Oh, and I suppose you're gonna say I can't bring my 'Xbox' or this keg of beer either." Goat says, "You can't!" Rat says, "Then how will I entertain my Dallas Cowboy cheerleader?" Goat says, "I give up." Girl says, "Your friend is quite a buzz-killer." Rat says, "Yes. We shall pray for him."
Yes she was. Probably still is, if she can get her insensitive grandkids out of the house.