Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for April 27, 2015
Transcript:
Pig: Hi lifeguard supervisor Lenny... How goes your job managing lifeguards? Lenny: Not good. I have just under 100 problematic swimming sites to monitor and not enough lifeguards. I have rivers, lakes, pools, you name it. Pig: Beaches? Lenny: No. I got 99 problems, but a beach ain't one. Censor: I'm watching you, Pastis. Pastsi: I know.
Sherlock Watson over 9 years ago
Next on the playlist: a biographical song about Hugh Hefner titled, “Hef, Hugh.”
abbybookcase over 9 years ago
a favorite tshirt of mine, life is a beech, with a picture of a tree
Vonne Anton over 9 years ago
Henny Youngman: Take my life….please. (misspelling intentional.)
AGED_ENGINEER Premium Member over 9 years ago
Racetrack announcer commenting on a racer having engine problems, saying the driver must be from Florida because he was saying something about sunny beaches when he went past the pits.
wiselad over 9 years ago
next, Detective Tracy meets Theodore Cleaver and the censor yet again tells Pastis “I am watching you”
knight1192a over 9 years ago
Life’s a beach and then you get censored
noahproblem over 9 years ago
Actually, I think he’d have a problem with a certain beach – a bilingual one where the angle of the sun (or as they call it there the “sol angle”) is particularly vexing, particularly when it visits him and his wife.
phylum over 9 years ago
I loves the beaches..
dadoctah over 9 years ago
I’m working on a book based on the premise that Jason from the Friday the 13th movies isn’t such a bad guy after all. I’m going to call it Voorhees: A Jolly Good Fellow.
eddie6192 over 9 years ago
Toon Boy’s really stretching it.
puddlesplatt over 9 years ago
I love Long Beach
vwdualnomand over 9 years ago
hope he didn’t invest in tidal.
PICTO over 9 years ago
Well I’ll be a son-of-a-beach…
546mailbox over 9 years ago
What is that guy beaching about?
Retired Dude over 9 years ago
I have a coffee mug that says “Life’s a fish . . . then you fry”.
e.groves over 9 years ago
Those sorry sunny beaches.
Sisyphos over 9 years ago
Cartoon-Boy may find the heavy hand of the Comic Strip Censor doing more than just pointing at him if he isn’t careful with these puns!
finale over 9 years ago
Today’s Barney and Clyde
finale over 9 years ago
I’d really like the beach especially without all that sand and humidity.
GoodQuestion Premium Member over 9 years ago
Stephan is treading in dangerous water today ……☻
anorok2 over 9 years ago
Maybe because it’s Monday morning, but I’ve reread this several times and I still don’t get it!!…..can someone help??
Saddenedby Premium Member over 9 years ago
if life is a beachwhich beach is it?sunny and warmor foggy and cool?palm trees or mangroves?coral or sand?do you really have to die?or is that just a government cover up?i guess i’ll never knowsince i left californe- i – oand what about beech-nut gum?what kind of gum is that?is a beach towel usedfor a beach ball?or – oh never mind – i can see the finger pointing right now!
whiteaj over 9 years ago
I too would like to know what punch line Pastis had in his head before the censor showed up.
ChessPirate over 9 years ago
“Dash it, this scab itches!” :-)
Number Three over 9 years ago
Comic Strip Censor! Been a while since we’ve seen him.
xxx
Kind&Kinder over 9 years ago
Another good laugh. Thanks, Stephan.
Emperor SterDog over 9 years ago
Loved this pun. You can keep posting the corny puns as well. But, &%$#$, stop with fourth wall $%&!!
ShadowBeast Premium Member over 9 years ago
I got a big laugh out of this one.
johngregor Premium Member over 9 years ago
Comic Strip Censor Guy should have his own spin-off comic strip.
Stocky One over 9 years ago
I got a great laugh out of this, but if it wasn’t for the fact that he referenced this song about a year ago or so, I wouldn’t have any idea what he’s talking about!
claire de la lune. over 9 years ago
Didn’t he already do this pun already?
finnygirl Premium Member over 9 years ago
frank corona asked: Maybe because it’s Monday morning, but I’ve reread this several times and I still don’t get it!!…..can someone help??:Sherlock Watson explained:Jay-Z has a song called “99 Problems” in which he says, “I got 99 problems, but a b#tch ain’t one.”
I reply: Thanks to frank for asking (as I was totally baffled, too) and thanks to Sherlock for explaining (not being a Jay-Z fan, I’d have never figured it out.) :-)
heybobhey over 9 years ago
Better than having a Donkey dressed up like a Clown. Assuming you know of another term for a Donkey…..
all.flesh.is.temporary over 4 years ago
REPEAT JOKE HAHAHAAAA
MALCOLMSTENZEL over 4 years ago
I do not get the reference
LilPeruna over 3 years ago
I believe, although I’m not sure, that this MAY have been the first PBS strip I read in the newspaper.