Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for September 30, 2000

Transcript:

Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling Did You Know? This week -- CHICAGO! Unless you live within 90 miles of this bustling metropolis, you probably can go a decade without a non-sports-related thought about Chicago... Chicago is a world-class city! From its kielbasa to its Polish sausages, it's well-known as the city that's particularly windy!! If you exclude certain other buildings, Chicago's Sears Tower is the largest building in the WORLD! Michael Jordan played basketball in Chicago because when his college career ended, N.B.A. rules forced him to! Tom Cruise has been to Chicago! In Chicago, softball is played with a ball 33% larger than an ordinary softball... ...no one can offer an explanation for this pointless behavior. Chicagoans claim to have the BEST PIZZA in the country! If you laid all Chicagoans down shoulder-to-shoulder, the width of the line would exceed 6 ft. in some places. In fact this product is not pizza at all, but some sort of bread-based lasagna-food. Certain exterior scenes in various television programs and motion pictures were shot in Chicago! Chicago enjoys a good-natured rivalry with L.A. and New York City! Meanwhile, L.A. and New York City enjoy a good-natured rivalry with each other. It would take a bit of research to refute the assertion that KEN BERRY IS FROM CHICAGO!