Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for January 19, 2002

Transcript:

Tom the Dancing Bug's Super-Fun-Pak Comix Edited by Ruben Bolling Only Cliche Punchlines Woman #1: You go, girl! Woman #2: Don't go there! Man: That was waaay too much information. Sex N' Death Hey, one-celled animal! You can either reproduce asexually and live forever... ...or reproduce sexually, and grow old and die. Later... One-Celled Animal: Damn. Three-Panel Mysteries Man: Joe's Dead! Man #2: And HE did it! Man: How do you know? Man #2: Simple! There are only two of you. Man #2: And YOU'RE merely a disembodied face! Man #3: Curses! Charlie the Asiatic Cheetah Charlie: Gimme a shot of bourbon. Bartender: Uh, that's $20. Bartender: er...we don't get many Asiatic cheetahs here. Charlie: That's because we're almost extinct, ya crook! Investigating the Nature of Scott Baio Man: I can determine Scott Baio's location but not his momentum. Woman: I can determine Scott Baio's MOMENTUM but not his LOCATION! Man: Perhaps it's folly to try to explain Scott Baio. We need only to enjoy him. Home N' Hearth by Ned Lundt & Ned Jr. "Back off, old man. That breast is mine!" "Would it have killed you to give me one damn word of encouragement at any point in my childhood, you miserable drunk? You think I ENJOYED being known as the kid from "Home and Hearth"?" "So, now I do all the work, and you just sit on your lazy butt collecting checks and getting top billing, is that it?" Note: Starting next week, "Home n' Hearth" will again be created by Ned Lundt, NOT Ned Lundt & Ned Jr.