Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for April 23, 2005

Transcript:

Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling President Bush's Culture of Life Blow-Out Sale George W. Bush: This administration VALUES LIFE! That's why we made the rule that any new EPA policy must be subject to a COST-BENEFIT ANALYSIS! My administration actually has the Environmental Protection Agency decide whether to require companies to reduce pollution, based on how the COST of compliance compares to the BENEFITS of lives saved. How does a CULTURE OF LIFE measure the VALUE OF LIFE? In COLD CA$H!! Little Brandon McKinney will be killed by sulfur dioxide spewed from your factory unless you spend $7 million on scrubbers. $6.1m But we value his life at $6.1 million, so save your money -- YOU DON'T HAVE TO COMPLY! BUT THAT'S NOT ALL! The EPA has valued the life of the elderly at only $3.7 million, since they're about to kick the bucket anyway. Only $3.7m So, you're not required to spend $4 million on personal that would prevent your arsenic output from killing Jeanne Forsch. BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE! Will you be forced to spend $2 million to install controls that would prevent David Reyes from being killed by your factory's mercury output? ACT NOW!!! $1m NOPE! He won't be killed for 30 years, so the EPA applies a DISCOUNT and values his life at the ROCK BOTTOM PRICE OF $1 MILLION! DOES the BUSH ADMINISTRATION VALUE LIFE? You bet we do -- right down to the last penny! SO...polluting corporations, CALL NOW to get GREAT VALUES today! EPA operators are standing by