Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for February 15, 2013

Transcript:

news of the times obama admin. developing legal-drone program why is the obama administration keeping its legal memoranda on its drone program top secret? because its department of justice is developing the most innovative, aggressive legal technology in the world. expert: if these legal positions got into the hands of the russians or the chinese, they could be reverse-engineered and used against us or our allies. legal secrecy expert name: classified and news of the times has learned that the obama administration is planning to deploy drones armed with these aggressive legal analyses into the battlefield*. *everywhere (source: classified) legal architecture is developed in department of justice labs. completed arguments are installed into high-tech drones. drones are then sent to law school. then five years at a corporate law firm to pay off law school debt. and then the legal-drones are battle-ready. legal rationales flit through the legal-drone's processor at lightspeed, providing cover for its client drones to decimate their targets. threat: "imminent" bystanders: "combatants" process: "due" execution: "constitutional"