Tom the Dancing Bug by Ruben Bolling for July 04, 2014

Transcript:

chagrin falls "soccer fixer" gavin: i thought i'd try watching world cup soccer, but wow, is this a dumb sport! fifa: pardon me. i'm the fifa soccer commissioner. i was walking by and overheard you. we're looking for ways to make our sport more popular. gavin: well, i've got plenty of ideas to fix it! each goal counts for nine points! you can use your hands for one minute out of every five! lightning round! the last ten minutes are played with six balls on the field! no ties! every minute in overtime, the goals are widened by one yard! on player on each team can carry a padded stick! plus water obstacles! t.v. timeouts with cheerleaders and fan prize kicks! opening theme song by billy ray cyrus! fifa: you've done it! you made soccer a popular sport around the world! gavin: good 'ol american ingenuity! spanish lady: gavin, i'm from the world spanish council. can you make our language more popular? gavin: sure! first, no more rolling r's. i mean, what's that about? next, "burro" is out! just call them what they are: donkeys! then.... spanish lady: bueno! mas manana