Ballard Street by Jerry Van Amerongen for October 20, 2012

Hey, a man and his hobby.

As one of the mostly silent majority, I just want ya’ll to know I enjoy the banter here and read it often. I love getting an extra laugh. Thanks!

This is what comes from getting dates on e-hammery.

You got something against thin metal riveting?

The conversation is riveting

Somebody get anniebodyhome a banana daquiri.

I have the same feeling as @anniebodyhome. I’ve been reading Ballard St and its comments for several months now. Love it. The banter, the craziness of life on the street. It’s wonderful. May I have a banana daquiri, too?

But I’m wondering… Why do all (or is it only almost all) the women have the crazy 2 tone hairdos and all the men seem to have brown hair. Do all the guys dye?

looks like he is going to get hammered tonight.

the only thing wrong with the comments is that a person with limited intellect (like me) can get lost fast.

He is going to show her his manhood.He is going to smash his index finger with that hammer.Manhood demonstrated.Guy with hammer banging on his hand. Friend runs ups shouting Hey what are you doing? Guy replies I dont know but it feels so good when I stop.

Is that a screwdriver in his pocket ? Now what is he going to do with that ? Wait, wait… don’t tell me !

Tell him I would love to hear about it. Got some work on the lighthouse that needs doing……

This is one of those BS comics that is so outrageously ridiculous that it is outrageously funny.@Red – loved the guitar song.

Here is a story from the Tales of the Highway Patrol.This happened down is South Texas Laredo area to be exact.Sheriff Monkey Blues will get a kick out of this.A bad guy wanted to turn himself in. He called the Sheriff to come by his house and honk the horn on the car and he would come out to go to jail. Local guy no issues.Sheriff was busy so he sent Deputy Buford. I along with others were at the dispatch office when Deputy Buford called in and said“Sheriff I done blowed this guy twice and he no come.”If it were not true I would not write it.Took us days to stop laughing. I dont know about you.Deputy Buford later received some retraining on radio speaking.Yes after 32 years of service (and counting) you would not imagine what your fine boys in blue (or whatever they wear) are up to.

Oh and lets not leave out Dallas Fire after the Big Tex fire.One is heard on the radio open channel in his Big Tex voice immitation say “Sure is Hot”Really questionable taste at the time. I imagine there will be retraining some time.

On myself and radio trafficI was out west Crane area south of Odessa. Check out a car that had run off the road. No one around. The was this cow creature come running out the dark and chased me to the roof of my car. I called in on the handheld radio to get some help. The critter would wack the side of my unit. All angry, mooing, ripping the ground. Really fierce.The dispatched asked for a description of the animal. I said and I quote.“Big red cow with antlers.”Do you see it? I realized it after I sent it off to go continuously till some alien culture receives it..I said ANTLERS. Cow have HORNS (dummy)Dispatch returned giggling uncontrollably they would send me help with cow and its antlers.Never lived that one down. All I had to say was ANTLERS and everyone around would break out laughing.You see everyone and I mean everyone in town had POLICE SCANNERS so they all 2,400 heard it.

Have a good day. Smell you later. I’ve got errands to run. We’ll all catch up at the Tiki.

Junkyard Cat said, about 8 hours ago

@Redkaycei Repoc

Jealous? Umm, no.Sacred to see you coming? ROFL!For someone who looks like they hang around in bars to pick up drunken sailors you’re certainly full of yourself.Hey, some of us drunken sailors resent that remark!!

Veteran said, about 1 hour ago

Here is a story from the Tales of the Highway Patrol.

OMG, you interrupted my Bloody Mary morning with that one!!…I laughed so hard, tears are coming out of my eyes….lmao….too freaking good!

To beviekA few beers, time on my hand, thoughts after 32 years. They just have to flow out. TIKI night too night. Whooweee I hope there are ladies there.Watching Military Channel. Khe Sanh. B52 taking care of business. I remember an air strike one time. Forward Air Controller FAC called in. Told us to get ready. Took about 4 to 5 minutes. Then hell on earth. Never felt the ground shake like that. What once was jungle now waste land. I knew for a fact there was a large truck convoy and several hundred soldiers in the area. Now there was junk and pieces. Felt sooo sorry for them. I hope they never knew what hit them. Now they can trace you cell phone on your hip to guide a bomb directly too you and it does not have to be transmitting. SCARY STUFF now.

Wow.. I get a couple of minutes to stop by and everybody’s running out the door?

Just a coke, please… lotta driving to do today.

Should get back late tonight… hopefully see you all when you get to the next block….Welcome to all you newcomers…Even the feral kitty if he’s housebroken..Plenty of banana bread for all!

Hey,That can happen.My wife lives with schizophrenia. Untreatable uncontrollable. I live in her world and am grateful to do so. I understand. I too have gotten angry a few times out here. You should have seen the rant I left on Endtown one time at a person I did not even know. His comments just ran me the wrong way. I apologized too. Welcome to step one. Shoot I imagine after they get the Tiki bar fired up me and the Sheriff will have to go separate a few. You will be okay. I visit an Army shrink every so often. Mainly now by phone. Ex twisted off Nam combat veteran. Sometimes those memories come flooding black like a sunami. But I continue on. Again you will be okay.

Hey there Repoc. I remember that song.I remembered an interview with guitarist for the Who. He described the loss of all those guitars he smashed on stage. How much he regretted destroying such beautiful things. Never to have them again. I never learned to play. I would have to play left handed as my left hand is not as fast as my right so when I do a quick fingering of chords with my left I look like a uncoordinated fool. Even changing one chord to another simply my left fingers go everywhere. Even to places I dont care to know.I can do a mean bass just as long as it is one note and I keep time with the drummer.

darn it!lost again!someone said something about losing their scroll on tuesday, and now i cant find it…

I withdraw my comment to you yesterday.And be welcome.

Dupont…better living through chemistry….

sheesh, you can buy a man a drink but you leave hot women like me and Bev and Susan out of it?

I forgive you, we all have our moods. Come and go as you please. Most people here are cool.

Isn’t virtual time travel wondrous? I just went back to yesterday and deleted a reply to a comment that also had been deleted. Almost like it never happened.

Just imagine the chaos if we still had the Edit button.While the Edit function was nice, the temptation for misuse is so great I against its return.

See Junkyard cat.There is love. Cyber world but its what we got.

It’s 23:17 Saturday night, the Briatolah of Rock & Rollah has arrived, the fun may now begin.

Whew…Back on Ballard St. again… yay….Very tired….. lots of driving…..And of course, that long trip on the #67 Ballard st bus, and the long walk from the last stop on Sundays, because of the street closure….I was happy to see that loft in the salon, after three days away… and very soon, I’ll be happy to be asleep there…Just thought I’d amble back to the Tiki for a bit first.

Red… if it’s not too late, can I take you up on your kind offer?I’d love a banana daiquiri…I might have to mix… er… grind it…myself, looks like,

but it’s ok, I’m allowed to run the machine.I haven’t seen the Monkey….He might have had a Saturday night gig…

Meanwhile….Great song…. but please…the Doors performed it… David Bowie too…but if all we get are the lyrics, it’s not a Doors song. it’s a Bertolt Brecht song…or if the tune comes till mind as well, a Brecht/Weill song… More a Lotte Lenya song than a Doors song.

Oh, and everyone down at the Tiki, remember to tip your service person (Bartender, waitress, busboy). Checking the after hours surveillance video brought up this

Here’s some video from before Sheriff MonkeyBlues. It’s down at dockside. It’s old so you could call it Old Mack from Way Back

And for you ladies down to the Tiki tonight this feller got a song fur you.Baby Please Don’t Go

This has got nothing to do with nothing.Black Cat Blues

On the other hand this time of morning calls for Coffee Blues

But on the the Gripping Hand Everything Gonna Be Alright

To Redkaycei Repoc and Linguist in particular I apologize. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>No apology necessary. We all have our off moments. I was having one myself when I reacted so harshly. So I’ll accept your apology if you’ll kindly accept mine.Please, when you feel up to it, join us anytime for the libation of your choice at the Tiki Bar and enjoy the B.S. on BS.Cheers !

No worries friend. You are very welcomed here.

….errr…I seem to have lost track of what’s going on today. Totally confused. I think I need a tequila or a scotch. Keep your dinnks simple (unless it’s a brandy Alexander).

Hey RepocGot on for you.Dig for this one. Great love song.Edward BearThe Last Song.

Cause of all the sex & violence sad violins over at FA today.I think it time fiddle around.San Antonio Rose

Boogie Woogie Fiddle Country Blues

Here’s Katie again with Orange Blossom Special

It’s time for HappyHappyHappy’s belated Birthday-party!

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