She’s My Girl by Tom Lehrer
Sharks gotta swim, and bats gotta fly,
I gotta love one woman till I die.
To Ed or Dick or Bob
She may be just a slob,
But to me, well,
She’s my girl.
In winter the bedroom is one large ice cube,
And she squeezes the toothpaste from the middle of the tube.
Her hairs in the sink
Have driven me to drink,
But she’s my girl, she’s my girl, she’s my girl,
And I love her.
The girl that I lament for,
The girl my money’s spent for,
The girl my back is bent for,
The girl I owe the rent for,
The girl I gave up Lent for
Is the girl that heaven meant for me.
So though for breakfast she makes coffee that tastes like shampoo,
I come home for dinner and get peanut butter stew,
Or if I’m in luck,
It’s broiled hockey puck,
But, oh well, what the hell,
She’s my girl,
And I love her.
There are actually a large number of edibles that are used for other purposes, and vice versa.
For example, in the military, we had a fire fighting foam that was also a survival ration. Our lemonade was also used to clean toilets, etc.
I once saw edible napkins in a novelty store; they were made mostly of pressed rice, and you were supposed to enjoy the looks on people’s faces as you ate your napkin.
rayannina about 14 years ago
And for breakfast, he makes coffee that tastes like shampoo …
(A prize for the first person to get the reference.)
Joe_Minotaur about 14 years ago
Was that “Bowl” or “Bowel”?
Coyoty Premium Member about 14 years ago
“It’s a floor wax!” “It’s a dessert topping!”
teal4two about 14 years ago
She’s My Girl by Tom Lehrer Sharks gotta swim, and bats gotta fly, I gotta love one woman till I die. To Ed or Dick or Bob She may be just a slob, But to me, well, She’s my girl. In winter the bedroom is one large ice cube, And she squeezes the toothpaste from the middle of the tube. Her hairs in the sink Have driven me to drink, But she’s my girl, she’s my girl, she’s my girl, And I love her. The girl that I lament for, The girl my money’s spent for, The girl my back is bent for, The girl I owe the rent for, The girl I gave up Lent for Is the girl that heaven meant for me. So though for breakfast she makes coffee that tastes like shampoo, I come home for dinner and get peanut butter stew, Or if I’m in luck, It’s broiled hockey puck, But, oh well, what the hell, She’s my girl, And I love her.
painterplumber about 14 years ago
you win
lewisbower about 14 years ago
Is it too late to go back to bed?
3hourtour Premium Member about 14 years ago
…a prize to the first person that references the reference…
mjbdiver about 14 years ago
The soup sounds ideal for cleaning dirty mouths as well.
alan.gurka about 14 years ago
A breakfast cereal for Zombies or normal humans: Brain flakes. How about getting your fruit (and vitamin C) while you get drunk–Sangria?
Digital Frog about 14 years ago
Actually, I knew a guy that used to buy his napkins by the loaf…
cyphercube about 14 years ago
There are actually a large number of edibles that are used for other purposes, and vice versa. For example, in the military, we had a fire fighting foam that was also a survival ration. Our lemonade was also used to clean toilets, etc.
pbarnrob about 14 years ago
Don’t forget messhall coffee; good for stripping paint!
Varnes about 14 years ago
God bless Tom Leher…Be Prepared Y’all….in My Home Town..
nc4tc about 14 years ago
Best thing since sliced napkins
Sherlock Watson about 14 years ago
I once saw edible napkins in a novelty store; they were made mostly of pressed rice, and you were supposed to enjoy the looks on people’s faces as you ate your napkin.
Possum Pete about 14 years ago
I thought he’d make coffee that tasted like a table.