Cleats by Bill Hinds for February 22, 2025

Reference to the book (and later movie) “The Mouse That Roared”, 1950s tale of a ridiculously tiny country that declares war on the United States with the intent of losing and being showered with foreign aid. Sequels had the Grand Fenwickians embarrassing America and Russia by getting to the moon first, and accidentally disrupting the world economy while trying to dispose of an inconvenient influx of cash.

Half the population of the world, really. India, China, Pakistan, Indonesia, Bangladesh, soccer’s not very important in any of them.

Thought Grand Fenwick’s sport was the longbow.

I once met a competitive dogsled team from South Africa that practiced on sand dunes.

I can actually imagine Jerry having a posh accent.

Look at all the equipment needed to play popular American sports, all the football (USA style) pads, helmets, radios, etc.; baseball, the different gloves, bats, helmets, catcher’s gear; golf, the expensive golf clubs, pricy balls, and massive golf courses.

Then in any country, rich or poor, there’s soccer (world football), a ball, a field, and something delineating the goal. Done!

Wow – THERE’S an obscure film reference! (’Nuff said…)

Hooray for Leonard Wibberly!

No sooner is the aggressor defeated, then the Americans pour in food, machinery, clothing, technical aid, and lots and lots of money for the the relief of it’s former enemies. In other words, gentlemen, in effect, we declare war on Monday, we are defeated on Tuesday, and by Friday we will be rehabilitated beyond our wildest dreams.