Close to Home by John McPherson for September 21, 2016

…and now we know where the kids are picking up the bad words.

But think of the vocabulary lesson the kids are getting.

My buddy who teaches 4 year olds says he has worn his teeth out opening packages for kids.

Probably a 25 million dollar government study to figure that out.

Just use a pair of scissors – but don’t run with them

Juice boxes are worse. They are not only impenetrable, but explode when you get into them.

My son’s elementary school got it right, the have “lunch room monitors” which are the older kids (4th and 5th graders) who walk around helping the younger kids with their lunches and they also mediate arguments. Of course, the teachers are there for support of things get out of hand – and for liability reasons too.

kids usually are the only ones that can open child proof containers or child locks…so might as well let the kids open themselves

your cafeteria workers wore short skirts? seems weird.

It’s the Amazing New Lunch Wrap Opener! Slices plastic wrap with ease, yet so safe, a child can use it! How much would you pay? Don’t answer yet, because if you order right now, you’ll get this fabulous Juice Box Opener absolutely FREE!

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I seen where a teacher told some of her kids to “kiss her where her farts come from” Great!!!

Packaging Engineers hate humanity.