Close to Home by John McPherson for July 26, 2020

I don’t drink coffee if i did i would go with plain milk, but that’s just me.

How many hamsters does it take to make a gallon of hamster milk?

“Norwegian beaver milk?” “No..”

“How about cow’s milk?” “We don’t get much call for that here.”

Black for me, please!

Echidna milk is actually a thing in Australia.

The best option is no milk.

Where is the skim milk?

Black no sugar please, after waiting in line for however long I want Coffee not dessert!

No milkweed? I’m never coming back here again, that’s for sure!

Where is the almond milk- must have for dairy free folks.

How the heck do you milk a barley?

Joke Milk?

I just hate it when i have to milk my cashews

Sorry but Jimmys is closed in Ft Myers https://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurant_Review-g34231-d15074044-Reviews-Jimmy_s_Java_Joint-Fort_Myers_Beach_Florida.html

The movie “The Animal” is not good, but the one funny bit is the badger milking,

One would assume that the ewer that is labeled simply as “milk” must be from humans, given that humans are the only consumers that are depicted. It’s a bit surprising, then, that none of the options is from a cow.

Damn it. They’re out of Yak’s milk again.

No coconut milk??

Not much of an exaggeration here.

“Hmm, lets see, I’ll have a triple venti double decaf half caf soy cappuccino latte with a shot of espresso and layer of vanilla cinnamon dolce caramel drizzle and chocolate sauce one-pump hazelnut mocha ristretto skinny macchiatto but not too much foam so’s to make room for the steamed whipped donkey milk.““Thank you, drive through!”

What? No ‘Mothers’ milk???

This place is misnamed, it should be Jimmie’s Milk Emporium. The coffee’s extra.

Pig milk is quite a trick, they don’t have nipples but areas of their skin that excrete milk

Don’t go with Bleeb’s recommendation

No cream? My father wouldn’t drink coffee without cream. Milk was not a suitable substitute.

Are they gluten free?

Just grab the one on the far left middle row that says “milk”.

I really believe they are milking the whole concept.

What, no human breast milk?

Little bleeb has a sheepish grin.