JumpStart by Robb Armstrong for April 12, 2014

Marcy…dear…it doesn’t work like that

When both my parents were still living, I, my husband and our two kids would go visit almost every Friday evening. I’d cook supper (usually burgers) while the grandparents entertained/supervised the kids. Nothing elaborate, but it was great just spending time with each other. I also made time to call my mom almost every morning for a chat. Mostly to make sure they were okay, but we’d chat about what was going on in each others’ lives. When I was still employed, (before kids) the phone calls were shorter, but still it was good to converse on a regular basis. As a result, I was much closer to my parents than my four older siblings. (All childless, and usually single.)

No one has a “responsibility” to help out one’s parents. They may CHOOSE to do so out of love.

There are no “inherent responsibilities” they are all social and cultural in form.None of them are Marcie’s reasons.Again, I don’t care it others don’t feel responsibilities, just shows how they were raised. Maybe irresponsibility is the way of the future.

But what if I don’t agree to disagree? Does that mean I have to agree because I didn’t agree not to agree??So we contemplate your examples A parent to a newborn. You DO mean both parents, don’t you? And how many men have left or simply ignored their offspring, figuring if the woman didn’t want to terminate the pregnancy, it was her decision and her responsibility?And how many women have tossed the newborn in the trash or dumped on a grandparent?In Rwanda after the Hutus and Tutsis got through murdering and raping each other, many thousands of children of rape were left in the fields for wild animals to eat. None of them agreed they were responsible. Standard practice in China for thousands of years was tossing excess, unwanted babies in the river.In Europe the practice was to abandon unwanted children in the woods for wild animals to eat. (Think Hansel & Gretel.).I don’t agree with these attitudes, but women don’t care what I think..Operator of a motor vehicle on public roads?There are legal requirement to do so, but it is obvious many feel no obligation to comply..In fact, if all complied with law, Joe would have an easy time at work or be laid-off because he would not be needed and Marcy would have less work at the hospital what with fewer shootings, knifings, car crashes, et cetera..Hence, even though I believe there are moral obligations, you and others don’t agree they all exist.

That’s because you’re working off of a false assumption. You assume you can say two opposite things and so confuse me that I won’t notice..You said:“But one does not have an inherent responsibilty.”After which you also said:“I think there are inherent responsibilities.”.So you claim they don’t exist but they DO exist. This must be more of that “agree to disagree” stuff, but with yourself..There is no natural law of the universe which requires children to act a certain way. There is only social conditioning and individual agreement within that conditioning.?Funny that folks act like “semantics” is a meaningless concept because they don’t really care about communication or truth, just noise.

“Whatever, dude, get angry and abusive if you like.”.Why would I get angry at you????.Yes, I am obtuse. I think you mean what you say. If you say, “Given the variables one may or may not feel a moral responsibility towards one’s parents. But one does not have an inherent responsibility.”, then I believe you are saying inherent responsibility does not exist to parents or to anyone else. You say it is all about how you feel..You brought up inherent responsibilities you feel exist for some reason. I pointed out that there are others like you who feel they don’t have those responsibilites just because they feel they don’t..Feelings, nothing more than feelings, Trying to forget my feelings of love responsibility.

And going back to your initial statement:“Your example of “missing out” does not equate to responsibility but to the advisability of maintaining a relationship.”.Missing out was not intended to equate to responsibility, simply a reward for acting on responsibility, that reward being greater understanding..Some people just love to be misunderstanding and abusive.That’s fine too, also shows how you were raised.Parents reap what they sow.

You throw in qualifiers after and seem to think I should have read between the lines or your mind and seem angry I did not.Interesting..And yes, I do not know what it is like to have abusive parents myself even though I have seen plenty of others with them..You have a problem with the concept that greater understanding is beneficial unless it makes previous actions justified or makes you happy. One could surmise many things from that attitude, but I see no benefit from investigating it further because you seem closed to the concept of improved understanding..It would be interesting to understand why you think some responsibilities exist when others don’t but you seem too angry to talk about it, so I just wish you peace and happiness.

“Whatever, dude, get angry and abusive if you like.”.Since i had expressed no anger and had not been abusive, it appears you are projecting your anger on me. Your statements about abusive parents obviously apply to some but nothing in this strip has EVER suggested Marcy’s parents were abusive. People who have been wronged often rush to suspect others — again, anger..You seem to think the discussion is some competition for some reason. It isn’t. I don’t care if you think children owe their parents or if you think they don’t owe them anything. Your continued argumentative stance is also interesting.You are a very interesting person..Again, be at peace and may you find happiness in life.