Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for October 25, 2014

Just gimme Monet… that’s what I want…

I hope Goat has some nice, strong magnets for his postcards. It would be a shame Toulouse any of them.

Let’s hope he keeps the Pollock in the fridge, too.

I don’t keep fine art in the kitchen, just classical music. Stuck to the fridge door with a magnet is a piece of paper with the heading “Chopin Liszt”.

Degas might be appropriate for my refrigerator, since that’s what food often gives me.

Not only is Pig clearly no student of fine art, he also has poor taste in spreads, Mayonnaise is vile. Maybe Goat should keep Pig in the fridge, so he can chill out….

I have a couple of Sargents, by the front door!

I have (real) butter. I have mustard. From time to time I may indulge in tzatziki or salsa…. Never, ever mayo, nor Miracle Whip….

Count the Money. De Mon-et

Once again, Pig raises stupidity to an art form.

Hellman’s!

I live near Kansas City, where the only legal condiment is barbecue sauce.

bad Manets can leave a sour Impression

Mayonnaise doesn’t like me. Too much fat, I guess. I really like mustard, but lately I’ve taken to eating my ham & cheese sandwiches dry. Good sliced cheddar or colby, good ham, on light toast. Meat, cheese, and bread. What more do you need?

I was at an art museum when I overheard two other people talk about Balzac. I thought he was some avant-garde artist who provocatively named himself after a slang term for a male body part. It turns out it was “Balzac” with a Z, and I’m the one with the dirty mind.

Uncultured swine!

“When this girl at the art museum asked me whom I liked better, Monet or Manet, I said, “I like mayonnaise.” She just stared at me, so I said it again, louder. Then she left. I quess she went to try to find some mayonnaise for me." — Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy

I used to love tuna and mayonnaise but I went off it for some reason.

Probably because I sickened myself with it.

xxx

One is Baroque when out of Monet. So I’ve heard…

I know Leonardo, Raphael, Michaelangelo and 35 other artistic European words……. plus, judo, karate and 13 other deadly Japanese words. I am very literate…………;-)

Mayonaise – The Smashing Pumpkins