Close to Home by John McPherson for November 20, 2014

I sure as hell wouldn’t want to go (literally) face to face with an animal that’s as ugly as sin-even if its claws were taped shut as they do at Red Lobster.

That’s Bob on the left.

Along with a bloody nose.

So, that would make them bobsters.

Bad plan. There’s no way for them to fail.

I would rather fill a tub with martinis and bobb for olives.

Accompanied by a lovely salmonella salad.

Forget lobsters. Real men bob for french fries.

Do you get to keep the ones you bobbed as pets? ’Cause we certainly not going to eat something that still snapping for a fight.