Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for June 02, 2015

A more sophisticated version of ‘you want fries with that?’…

Didn’t the Monty Python group do a sketch similar to this using the famous Philosophers in “The Meaning of Life” movie?

Just bring him the top half.

When you pour wine into a glass, that’s a process called “filling” and if you stop at half way, the glass is half full. Drinking wine from a glass is a process called “emptying” and if you stop at half way, the glass is half empty. I’d like a glass that’s half full and I’ll do the emptying.

What is reality? Some of the smartest people I’ve ever met I met working with them serving banquets…..

it seems the more emptying I do the stupider everybody else gets.

A pessimist sees the glass as half empty. An optometrist asks if you see the glass as more full like this? Or like this?

This is a fun board today! Thanks @Gaijinrabbit for the links to those two sketches. Humbled that the best I can come up with right now is the scene from Finding Nemo with Marlin and Dory in the whale’s mouth (and I love how the half full/half empty play perfectly fit their personalities).

And the Liberal Arts major says “Would you like fries with that drink?”

“Yes”

It very much depends on what you think of the service, of course.

The pessimist sees the glass as half empty.The optimist sees the glass as half full..The 40 year old sees the glasses and says, “I can’t believe I have to wear bi-focals now!”

Quit’cher wine-ing!

“The world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: What’s up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don’t think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass! " – Terry Pratchett

Did he ask him to sniff the wine after pouring just an itty-bitty?

Schrödinger’s cat doesn’t want anyone to observe the glass to begin with. [http://www.businessballs.com/glass-half-full-empty.htm]

Presented for your enjoyment:

BENTONVILLE, ARK (AP) – Some Wal-mart customers soon will be able to sample a new discount item: WAL-MART’S OWN BRAND OF WINE. The world’s largest retail chain is teaming up with E&J Gallo Winery of Modesto, Calif., to produce the spirits at an affordable price; in the $6-8 range.

“While wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to throw a bottle of Wal-mart brand wine into their shopping carts, there is a market for cheap wine,” said Kathy Micken, professor of marketing at Roger Williams University in Bristol, R.I. “There is wine in a box that people are willing to buy,” she said. “The right name is important.”

The top 15 suggested names for Wal-mart Wine:

15. Box O’ Grapes

14. Chateau Traileur Doublewide

13. White Trashfindel

12. Big Red Gulp

11. Grape Expectations

10. Domaine Wal-mart: “Merde du Pays”

9. NASCARbernet

8. Chef Boyardeaux

7. Peanut Noir

6. Blue Light Special Nun

5. Chateau des Moines

4. Martha Stewart’s Sour Grapes

3. I Can’t Believe It’s Not Vinegar!

2. World Championship Wriesling

and the number 1 name for Wal-mart Wine…

1. Nasti Spumante

Gimme a full one, and I’ll make it half empty.

Interesting

“Completely full, please. I shall think it is half full.”

If gravity prevails (as it generally does) on the floor.

It is better to be a pessimist than an optimist. For though they both gloat when they happen to be right, only the pessimist is happy when he is wrong.Realistically speaking, that is.

They asked Benny Hill that question and he took the glass, gulped down the contents and said “it’s completely empty!”.

The optimist says “The glass is half full.”The pessimist says “The glass is half empty.”The wife says “it is just another dirty glass she has to wash.”

No. I was just commenting on the use of the term in the Monty Python skit.